


For Those Who Wait

by xenzen



Series: A city boy from Earth and a farm girl from Mindoir [4]
Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Biotics, Comedy, Complete, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Friendship, Humor, Light Bondage, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-27
Updated: 2013-03-31
Packaged: 2017-12-06 16:41:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 29,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/737856
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xenzen/pseuds/xenzen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An expanded version of what happens after that dinner date on the Presidium.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Kaidan just barely ducked the equipment container flying at his head, and threw himself to the side to avoid another one following right after it. His body slid across the smooth, polished floor, and he scrambled to hide behind a console, feeling the deck shake as the heavy boxes bounced behind him. Despite having some immediate cover, he knew it was a bad position - his opponent was fast, cunning, and powerful. There was no way he could survive while staying solely on the defensive.

He peeked over the edge of the holo display, but the enemy was nowhere in sight. Thinking fast, he vaulted over the computer, making for the last pile of cartons that was still stacked in a neat column - it would be a much better hiding place than the waist-high console.

Or at least it would be - if it weren't for the singularity that suddenly burst into existence right in front of him.

"Shit!" Kaidan hissed, lunging for the nearby rail even as the powerful gravity well reached out to pull him in. He could see the stack of cartons leaning, and hear the ones that'd fallen on the floor sliding as they were drawn in, too.

It was all over if it caught him, but what could he do, besides wait until it weakened and collapsed? The problem was that he was helpless, a total sitting duck, even if he'd managed to catch himself. No, he had to escape right now, right this second. Taking a breath, he tried to relax his death grip on the cool metal rail in order to pull himself along it hand over hand, but the singularity was way too strong, and he had to grab on again before he lost his hold entirely.

All right, so he couldn't pull himself out using brute strength, but there had to be another way to extricate himself. Wait, there was! But could he modulate his biotics with enough precision to cancel out the mass effect field? Too little, and there'd be no effect; too much, and the opposing oscillation of his own dark energy might cause a detonation. Having seen what a violent, full-force combination could do to an enemy - or a group of enemies - in the field, he really didn't want it happening to him.

Kaidan turned his head, catching movement in the corner of his eye. Crap, no time to think about it. Freeing one hand from the rail, he formed a quick mnemonic in the direction of the singularity while keeping hold with the other, and felt the lightning arc through his body as the eezo nodes in his system flared with power.

The biotic explosion was almost gentle, like the effect of a practice grenade, but it still knocked the breath out of him as it sent him flying into the rail, where he bounced back into the stack of crates. As he tucked himself into a ball and rolled out of the way of the falling boxes he'd knocked down, he hoped it had surprised his opponent; he'd been expecting it - but there was no way she could have.

Sure enough, when he uncurled, he saw the enemy was down, sprawled in an untidy heap of black and red limbs against a carton; she must've been quite close when he set off that detonation. Still, even though she looked unconscious, he crept forward with caution, barrier up to full strength - his opponent was a master of surprise attacks, and it wouldn't do to underestimate her. She made a tempting target, though, and once he had his prize in hand - the battered N7 patch magnetized to her armor - he'd be the winner of this game.

With one hand raised, fingers ready to form a mnemonic, Kaidan bent down, reaching for the patch on his opponent's chest. As expected, she moved in that instant, but his mnemonic wasn't even half formed before she'd grabbed his arm and planted a boot in his stomach, flipping him onto his back.

Damn! He'd been expecting a biotic attack, not a physical one - his barrier didn't help him. In desperation, he raised his hand again to try another mnemonic, but a mass effect field already held him immobile. All Kaidan could do was let his head fall against the floor and sigh in defeat as his opponent pressed her knee against his chestplate and peeled off the Spectre logo from his armor. When the stasis wore off a moment later, she held out her hand, magnanimous as ever in victory; he took it and let her pull him to his feet.

Kaidan pulled off his helmet. "Goddammit - I was so close!" he complained, pinching his fingers together to illustrate just how much.

Shepard unsealed her own helmet, revealing short black hair plastered to her forehead with sweat, her gray eyes dancing with amusement as she handed the patch back to him. "You were - almost got me with that explosion. I really wasn't expecting that."

"Is it safe for Lieutenants Vega and Cortez to return to the shuttle bay, Commander?" EDI's disembodied voice said.

"Yeah, we're done, EDI," Kaidan answered, waving at the two men on the engineering deck, where they'd been watching them through the windows. He narrowed his eyes when there seemed to be a suspicious amount of omni-tool waving going on up there. So, there was a betting pool already.

"Can't win 'em all," Shepard said with entirely too much cheer as she led the way to their equipment lockers, her hands busy undoing latches and loosening straps as she went.

"Says the woman who wins two times out of three," he grumbled as he did the same.

At the lockers, she turned her back to him so that he could help her out of her armor; the wordless display of trust never failed to warm his heart. It only took a moment to pull all the pieces off, he'd had so much practice at it by now, though he was tempted to take his time over the task; the impulse to bury his nose in her hair and take in the familiar scents of sweat, soap, medi-gel and metal was difficult to resist. The combination of such mundane odors shouldn't smell so sexy, but it was linked forever in his mind with Shepard.

Then it was his turn to present his back to her so that she could help him with his own armor. Was it his imagination, or did her hands seem to linger on him just a little longer than necessary? Did she lean a little too close? He suppressed a shiver when her fingers brushed his neck near his amp port as she disconnected the power modulator in the back of his gorget.

Maybe it was just born of sexual frustration, an overwhelming need to touch her, or maybe it was just the pleasant buzz of using mental powers fueled with the adrenaline still running through his body, but on an impulse, he fired up the eezo nodules in his system again. Instead of using his biotics in an offensive manner, he modulated them into a gentle dark energy field, not even strong enough to be visible to the naked eye, and expanded it outwards from his body.

He heard her indrawn breath as their barriers began to intersect and merge, and turned around to face her; she was still very close to him, almost close enough to kiss. Her eyes had closed, but he could feel her biotics reacting to his, a thousand rippling tendrils brushing through his hair, touching his face, sliding beneath his undersuit. It was an indescribable sensation, like standing under warm rain - if raindrops could be alive and intelligent and move of their own volition.

Then they jumped apart when they heard the hiss of the elevator doors opening, and Kaidan inwardly cursed the rotten timing as both of their dark energy fields dissipated. Shepard's eyes were open again as she turned towards her locker, her face a little flushed. His face felt hot, too.

"Mornin', Commander, Major," James greeted them as he and Steve stepped off the elevator, completely oblivious to the fact that Kaidan wanted to throw the pair of them across the room with his biotics. 

The other marine had two cups of coffee in his hands, while the pilot had one of tea. "Brought you guys your usual."

The fragrant scent of fresh-brewed coffee wafted towards Kaidan's nose, weakening his resolve to strangle the lieutenants; he decided to forgive James for the interruption. This time. He cleared his throat and said, "Thanks, just put it down somewhere - we're almost done."

"I'm glad you suggested wearing armor for practice, or we'd both end up black and blue," Shepard said, sounding a little breathless as she began to strip out of the undersuit, leaving her in just a black sports bra, shorts, and socks. Since they'd decided their training sessions would only last for an hour, neither of them had bothered with the hassle of hooking up the plumbing.

"Wouldn't want Hackett to know you beat your subordinates, right?" He grinned, ducking a blow she mimed at his head, and tried not to stare at his half-naked commander as she stretched. She had to be doing that on purpose. "I'm surprised you're not wearing that godawful armor you like so much."

"Don't blaspheme this early in the morning, Kaidan," Shepard said with a mock scowl as she put on a shirt with too much efficiency for his liking. Then she grimaced. "That thing's a collector's item now, with Earth... being what it is. The right buyer would pay a fortune for it, so I can't afford to get it banged up anymore."

"Right," he drawled as he pulled on his pants. "So it had nothing to do with the fact that it made you stand out on the battlefield like a krogan at a hanar poetry reading, which meant all the bad guys just loved picking on you."

Shepard threw a towel at him. "Shut up."

Kaidan caught the towel before it could hit him in the face, and chuckled. "I guess all this biotic exercise must doing you some good if you're feeling so frisky at this time of day."

The commander paused in the middle of combing her hair back into some semblance of order; since she'd used her fingers, tufts of it stood up every which way, and Kaidan had to stifle an urge to reach out and smooth them down. "Yeah... you know, I do feel better - less on edge."

"I was talking with Liara the other day, and she said she thought Javik might be interested in joining us - probably just so he could tell us primitives we're doing it wrong."

Shepard's eyes widened. "Really? I admit, I'm pretty curious about Prothean biotic techniques."

"So is Liara - if you know what I mean." He waggled his eyebrows at her.

"Kaidan!" she scolded, then covered her mouth to hide a laugh.

He shrugged, unapologetic, as he walked with her back towards the elevator. "Well, I remember her as a lonely kid -"

Shepard snorted. "That 'kid' is a hundred and nine years old - older than you and me put together."

"You know what I mean! Anyway, I remember when she had a serious crush on you - not to mention a bad case of hero worship - even if you don't."

She smirked and elbowed him in the ribs. "And you didn't?"

"That was different." Kaidan coughed. "I wasn't lusting after you because of a vision from a Prothean beacon - I was lusting after you for completely unrelated reasons. See? Totally different."

The commander snorted, then laughed. "Really? You'll have to tell me, some time. Well, don't worry about Liara - she's long since gotten over me. She's grown up a lot, these last three years." 

Kaidan wasn't sure whether to be indignant that she thought she needed to reassure him, or grateful that she really wasn't interested in Liara. To cover his confusion, he picked up the cup of coffee that'd been left for him on the workbench. The hot liquid, bitter with added electrolytes and antioxidants, sluiced some of the usual post-biotic exercise weariness out of his system.

"How was the workout?" James asked as he leaned against a console, sipping his own coffee. His eyes only wandered over the commander once before sliding away, so Kaidan decided to let it go.

"Good," Shepard said, blowing on the tea Steve had set out for her to cool it. "Sorry for all the extra work we're making for you -"

James interrupted with a wave of one beefy arm. "Pfft, don't worry about it. I got nothin' to do now that I've cleaned out practically everyone on the ship at the poker table."

Steve looked less than enthusiastic as he took in all the fallen crates littering the shuttle bay floor, but still said, "Not a problem, Commander."

Shepard noticed the pilot's reticence, of course, and turned to Kaidan with a smirk. "You take the left, Major, and I'll take the right."

"Aye aye, Commander." Kaidan hid a grin when he saw Steve's wide eyes; James had seen them in action, and wasn't impressed anymore. Blue coronas surrounded Kaidan and the commander as they began using their biotics to stack all the boxes back into neat piles. It was such easy work, compared to taking down Reaper troops, that he didn't even spill his coffee.

"Show-offs," James muttered. "Hope you put them all back in the right order - I got a system, you know."

"Rummaging is half the fun, Mr. Vega," Steve called as he headed for his work area.

"Depends on what and where, Esteban." James turned back to Shepard. "So... scuttlebutt says we're heading to the Citadel next, Commander," he said in a suspiciously offhand manner.

That was news to Kaidan. "We are?" he asked, ignoring James's knowing smirk, and also the way his palms began to sweat. Did Shepard remember he'd invited her out on a date?

She nodded, finishing off her tea and throwing the empty cup into a receptacle. "Yeah, I've got some business I have to attend to - meetings, reports, shopping, that sort of thing. EDI's already set up a liberty rotation, if you're worried you won't see any action."

"Hey, you know me, Commander - if I can't find some, I'll make some."

"I'm sure you would, James. Well, I'm going to hit the showers," Shepard said, waving a hand. "Thanks for the tea, Steve."

"You're welcome, ma'am."

Kaidan saw an opportunity to take James aside, and draped a friendly arm around the younger marine's muscular shoulders. "I'll be getting a cut of the profits, right? I know you've got a betting pool set up."

James opened his mouth to deny it, but was perceptive enough to realize Kaidan wasn't above holding him upside down with his biotics to shake out Kaidan's share of the credits. He sighed, looking mournful. "Fine, fine - I'll set up a transfer to your account."

Feeling cheered by the prospect of being able to afford a more expensive meal at Apollo's than planned, Kaidan gave the other man an friendly slap on the back - it was like hitting a side of beef - and said, "Good to hear it." In a louder voice, he called, "Gotta go, guys."

Kaidan tossed his empty cup and hurried to the elevator after the commander. Once inside, Shepard gave him a curious look. "What were you discussing with James?"

"Oh, nothing - just giving him some friendly advice." He cleared his throat. "So, uh, Shepard... you still interested in having dinner with me?"

"I haven't forgotten, if that's what got you looking so worried," she teased.

He relaxed just a little, but not enough to stop himself from babbling. "What time's good for you? I could make reservations - but if you don't know when you'll be free, or something comes up, that's okay, too. I'll just, uh, improvise. Oh, I know a place that, ah, still has steak - it's not as classy, it's just a small shop down in the Wards, but the food's good, and -"

"Kaidan," Shepard said, her smoky voice dropping an octave and taking on that hoarse rasp she saved just for him. His mouth snapped shut. Reaching out, she took one of his sweaty hands in hers. "How does 1800 sound? We can meet back here at the _Normandy_ , since I doubt you'd want to follow me all over the Citadel the whole day."

He frowned, even though she was rubbing soothing circles into the back of his hand with her thumb. "I wouldn't mind, actually; I'd feel better if you had an escort. It hasn't been that long since Cerberus tried to take over the Citadel - they might still have agents in place, just waiting for the chance to get the jump on you."

The fact that he felt much more confident thinking about her security instead of their date didn't fail to tickle his sense of the absurd.

"I'll be fine. C-Sec's been much more vigilant since the coup," she assured him, ignoring his disbelieving snort. "The people I need to talk to might feel too nervous, seeing not just one, but _two_ Spectres."

He gave her a worried look. "Just who're these people, anyway? I mean, only criminals would be scared of Spectres, right?"

"Spectres are like tax auditors - no one in their right mind wants to see one up close and personal."

Chuckling at her rueful smile, he said, "I guess you've got a point there."

The doors opened on the crew deck, but Kaidan was reluctant to let go of her hand; he was just glad it was still too early in the day cycle for there to be anyone waiting for the elevator.

"Isn't this your stop? Or did you want to use my shower instead of the ones in the men's bathroom?" Was it his wishful thinking that was coloring her words with more than a hint of sly suggestion?

He swallowed, trying to dismiss the sudden image of Shepard clad in nothing but soap suds. Doing his best to ignore the voice of his libido, which was screaming at him to take her up on her offer, he managed to shake his head and say, "See you at breakfast?"

"Sure thing."

Was that a disappointed sigh he heard? Nah - it was probably just the sound of the air cyclers. Kaidan gave the commander a little wave over his shoulder, then scuttled to the men's room to engage in conduct very unbecoming of an officer before he exploded out of sheer frustration. 

Being a romantic in this day and age just wasn't all it was cracked up to be.


	2. Chapter 2

Feeling too jittery to stay still in starboard observation as the time of his date with Shepard neared, Kaidan found himself walking out of the elevator and into the CIC; it would be a while before they reached the mass relay that would hurl them across the galaxy to the Citadel. He'd already finished all his reports for both the Council and Hackett, including Shepard's share, the crew was looking forward to some shore leave, so none of them had approached him with problems, or even just for idle chit-chat.

The satisfaction and pleasure he'd felt, solving some small problem for the crew, had surprised him. Steve had been the first to ask him for help, since Kaidan had become a sort of unofficial XO for the _Normandy_. The lieutenant had needed authorization to purchase some licenses to enable the ship's fabricator to turn out parts for some of the more exotic weapons they carried, and was amazed when Kaidan was able to produce them on the spot with a simple wave of his omni-tool.

Then Chief Adams - boy, had that been a shock, seeing another face from the old SR-1 - had come to see him about requisitioning some classified tech the salarians were working on for his department. After a successful negotiation with his contact in the STG, Dr. Chakwas asked Kaidan about getting access to the research she'd been working on in the Alliance R&D lab on the Citadel; she'd signed a non-disclosure agreement, and could neither continue her work, nor discuss it with other experts in the field via secured extranet after her transfer. All it took was a word in Hackett's ear, and the doctor's request was granted.

A week later, James had invited him to his poker games with the former Cerberus engineers, and after they'd resolved the initial confusion about why Kaidan was subordinate to Shepard even though he was of higher rank, the other crewmen started coming to talk to him in starboard observation.

Sometimes their conversations were about the war, sometimes about their worries for the loved ones they'd left behind, and sometimes they were even about girl or boy troubles. Kaidan wasn't expected to give any actual advice about the last - much to his secret relief - just to be there to lend a sympathetic ear.

They should've brought their problems to Shepard - if she hadn't picked up on them first - but the entire crew seemed to have formed an unspoken agreement not to disturb the commander more than they had to. Kaidan wasn't the only one who'd noticed she was running herself ragged for the war effort, and no one had been willing to bother her with petty issues.

The commander was leaning on the rail of the small platform overlooking the galaxy map, and he took a moment to admire the way her backside filled out her uniform. Dress blues again - that was one sure way of predicting her schedule: she'd been talking to some Very Important People on vid-comm, or were about to meet with them in person, given that their destination was the Citadel. Damn, she sure looked good in them - and she'd look even better out of them.

Specialist Traynor gave him a smile as he passed her with that happy thought in mind, but Shepard was too deep in thought to notice him, to judge by the industrious way the cinnamon stick in her mouth was being chewed on. Which was just fine with him; he really didn't want an audience if he made a fool of himself - a common occurrence when it came to Shepard. He exchanged nods with the other crewmen at their stations as he walked towards the bridge.

Breathing in the smell of plastic, leather and electronics, Kaidan sat himself down at the station behind and to the left of Joker; he didn't want to be accused of ogling EDI's platform if he was behind her. Besides, the sight of it still freaked him out a little.

Joker looked over his shoulder to see who'd invaded his domain, and snorted when he saw Kaidan. "We're already heading for the mass relay at all safe speed - we're not gonna get to the Citadel any faster if you come up here and twiddle your thumbs."

"What, I'm not allowed up here unless I want something?" Kaidan retorted as he turned on the holo display. The monitor defaulted to show the trajectory of the ship as it traveled across the system towards the symbol representing the relay.

"Come on," Joker scoffed. "Who do you think you're fooling?"

"Maybe I like the view from here," Kaidan said, trying not to sound defensive.

Joker snickered. "Man, it's sad when you can't come up with a better excuse than that. Everyone knows you've turned the starboard observation deck into your new mancave. You know, the room with the big-ass window?"

"My new 'mancave', as you call it, doesn't have a computer terminal."

"Right," the pilot drawled. "So you're telling me you'd rather come all the way up here, when the crew quarters are right outside your mancave?"

"I needed the exercise."

"You mean Shepard doesn't give you enough every morning?" Only Joker could put a leer right into his words.

Kaidan scrubbed his hands on his thighs, then folded his arms to keep from fidgeting as he stared at the holo, silently willing the little _Normandy_ icon to move faster. _Go go go!_ "I... I don't know what you're talking about."

"You two need to just get laid already before you both pop."

"I don't see where it's any of your damn business," Kaidan said through gritted teeth. He could probably order Joker to shut the hell up, but the pilot was capricious enough to ignore it. Anyway, smacking Joker down was like trying to knock down those dolls that were weighted on the bottom - they popped right back up and hit you in the crotch more often than not.

Joker swiveled his chair to face him. "I'm serious! The whole galaxy's going to shit, Shepard keeps taking on Reapers on foot - you read that report about that destroyer on Tuchanka, right? All I'm saying is, you might not get another chance to kiss and make up, yanno?"

Kaidan felt his blood run cold at the reminder of Shepard's mortality. "Didn't think you cared that much."

The pilot swiveled back to face his instruments. "Yeah, well, I just know Ash would be pissed if she knew all the work she did to get you together came to nothing - she'd come storming outta heaven and kick _all_ our asses. Besides, who knows what'll happen when you put a powerful biotic like you together with a bad case of blue balls?"

" _Joker_."

The other man had the audacity to guffaw. "Innocent bystanders might get hurt - and I might be one of them! So I got a lot riding on this."

"Jeff is referring to the fact that he has placed a substantial amount of credits into the betting pool Lieutenant Vega has started, Major," EDI said, making things even more awkward with her 'help' - as usual.

Kaidan was stunned speechless. His mouth opened and shut, but nothing came out, until he managed to croak, " _What_?"

"That was not a joke," EDI confirmed.

"Liara was right - you _are_ a blabbermouth, EDI. You weren't supposed to mention that," Joker said with a sigh. "Remind me to teach you the meanings of _tact_ and _discretion_."

"You can't teach something you don't know yourself, Joker," Kaidan snapped as he tried to rub the blush off his face and concentrated on taking deep breaths. "Do you honestly mean to tell me people are betting on when we're going to have sex?"

It was apparent he and Shepard hadn't been discreet enough, if everyone and their space hamster knew. Not that anything had happened to be _in_ discreet about. Yet.

"Uh... well..." The pilot cleared his throat, suddenly absorbed by the data on his console. "Approaching the relay in ten minutes," he said into the intercom.

Kaidan shut off the holo display at his station with an agitated swipe of his hand. "Excuse me, I need to - I have to... I need to go have a word with Lieutenant Vega."

"Was it something I said?" Kaidan heard EDI ask with genuine puzzlement before the bridge doors closed behind him.

Distracted, he almost ran down Shepard; too late, he remembered she liked to watch from the cockpit just before they entered a mass relay.

"Hey, where's the fire, soldier?" the commander said as she caught him by the elbow, a teasing note in her husky voice.

"I, uh, I just need to go talk to James," he replied, feeling the hairs on his arm rise as her fingers caressed his bare skin; her body hid the gesture from the sight of the crewmen at their stations. 

Shepard lowered her voice, concern replacing the playfulness. "Are you all right? Is there a reason your face is so red?"

"Just, uh, thinking about our date," Kaidan said, thinking fast. If Shepard found out about the betting pool, she'd bounce James around like a clawball all over the shuttle bay. Not that the kid didn't deserve it, but they needed the lieutenant with all his limbs intact; Steve couldn't possibly take care of their arms and armor _and_ pilot the shuttle, too.

"Hitting the relay in five minutes," Joker said over the comm.

"You'll have to tell me all about it later," the commander said, her fingers brushing down Kaidan's arm.

"Yeah, sure," he said, catching her hand and giving it a brief squeeze. _Not a chance._

Shepard gave him a smile that seemed full of promise, then turned to continue on towards the cockpit. Kaidan watched, in what he hoped was a covert manner, the way her ass flexed under her trousers as she walked. Then the doors closed, hiding her from view, and he sighed; there were too many goddamned hours left until their date. Well, he still needed to teach James a lesson, and he had the time to contemplate an appropriate revenge.

Like a lightning bolt from the heavens, the idea for the perfect payback appeared in his mind, fully formed, like a vision from God - or maybe the devil.

"That's an evil-looking smile you've got on your face there, Major," Samantha commented as he approached her on his way to the elevator. "Do I want to know what you're thinking?"

"No," Kaidan confirmed, tossing her an amiable half salute as she watched him step into the elevator. "No, you don't, Traynor."

He sauntered out onto the engineering deck, heading for the starboard cargo bay, where their newest - and strangest - crew member had his quarters.

"Enter," came the terse answer from the comm when Kaidan knocked.

Kaidan walked into the misty, humid room, and let his eyes adjust to the darkness; the smell inside was reminiscent of both a fetid swamp and the rich soil of a jungle. "Hello, Javik."

The Prothean grunted in answer, turning from the wide sink of water to look at his visitor with all four eyes, his lips twisting as if he smelled something bad. "Hrm. You stink of pheromones, human," he commented.

"Good morning to you, too," Kaidan said, voice dry, looking for a place to sit and not finding one. Then again, their new Prothean friend didn't exactly go out of his way to make visitors welcome.

"It would be less of an affront to my senses if you would simply mate with the commander and be done with it," Javik said, topping EDI in the department of awkardness-inducing remarks in Kaidan's view. "Then, perhaps, she will not bring such a stink when she comes to speak with me."

Kaidan tucked that morsel of information away, even as his face started feeling warm again. So, Shepard didn't smell as cool and aloof as she looked, huh? Maybe those dark circles under her eyes weren't all due to her worries about the war, after all.

"What is it you want?" the Prothean asked, running one three-fingered hand through the water. His lip lifted in a sneer, revealing a fang. "If you stay much longer, I will have to ask the synthetic to cycle the air again - and I abhor asking the machine for anything."

"Specialist Traynor gave you an omni-tool and access to the _Normandy's_ comm system, right?"

"Yes - it is a primitive mode of communication, as is everything in this cycle, but it is a burden I will learn to bear." Kaidan got the impression Javik wasn't just referring to technology. All four of Javik's eyes blinked. "Why do you ask?"

"I'd like to, uh, borrow your account to send some messages - I can't fool EDI if I try to hack the system with someone else's identity. She'd blab about it to Joker, and then the whole crew would know."

The Prothean folded his arms and stared at Kaidan for a moment. "And why do you wish to do this?"

Kaidan wondered how he was supposed to explain the concept of a betting pool to Javik, and decided honesty would be the best policy - and a necessary one, given the Prothean's ability to sense lies. "It's part of my plan to get back at James - Lieutenant Vega - because he set up a, a game, and didn't tell me about the stakes or the thing being bet on."

Javik's eyes narrowed to slits. "Games of chance were punishable by death in the Empire."

"Of course - I should've guessed." Kaidan scratched his head, and tried not to let the second thoughts creeping up on him dissuade him from his plan.

"Ah," Javik said in a tone of dawning surmise. "Yes, I should have realized sooner - you plan to execute him. As is your right as his superior officer... but I do not understand why you require access to my account, however. Or does the commander oppose your course of action?"

Kaidan held up his hands. "No, no, that's not how we do things in this cycle. We believe in teaching people a lesson so they won't do it again, and that can't happen if they're dead, okay?"

The Prothean's eyes blinked in sequence, from left to right. "How else will you dissuade other would-be offenders?" he asked with genuine bafflement.

"Look, just take it on faith that that's how humans do it."

Javik grunted. "I do not understand anything. I do not understand anything in this cycle."

"So will you let me use your account?"

"Very well, if it will get you and the stench of your pheromones out of my quarters that much sooner." The Prothean turned back to look into the pool of water. "Do as you wish."

Kaidan whipped out his omni-tool and set the necessary programs into motion, fingers flying in haste, before the Prothean could change his mind. "Thanks, Javik! I'll get out of your hair now - uh, I mean, out of your quarters now."

He hurried back up to his mancave - er, starboard observation - and tried to contain his chuckles as he typed a text message into his omni-tool. He sat down on a couch and attempted to regain his composure; he needed to sound like the Prothean if he had any hope that James would fall for the deception.

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-24601384-JAVIK: _Lieutenant, a matter has come to my attention that has piqued my interest._

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-38420100-VEGA-J: _Hey, Buggy, what's up?_

Kaidan hesitated, blinking at the nickname; he was surprised Javik hadn't already threatened to throw the lieutenant out the airlock for using it. Should he put in a warning for versimilitude?

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-24601384-JAVIK: _I have asked you politely not to call me that, human. I will not be so polite, next time._

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-38420100-VEGA-J: _Right, right, I got it. You know, the shuttle bay isn't that far from the engineering deck, why don't you come on down?_

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-24601384-JAVIK: _I would prefer to be alone with my thoughts._

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-38420100-VEGA-J: _Shy, huh? I get that. So... what do you want to know?_

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-24601384-JAVIK: _I have heard the other crew members speaking of a 'betting pool'. I understand you are gambling on the exact time when the commander and Major Alenko will finally mate?_

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-38420100-VEGA-J: _Oh, you heard about that, huh? Yeah, thought I'd have a little fun, make a few credits. Uh, you're not going to try to get me executed or something, right? We're in the Alliance, not the Empire._

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-24601384-JAVIK: _Indeed. I believe you have garnered a more substantial amount of funds than you are willing to admit._

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-38420100-VEGA-J: _Maaaybe._

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-24601384-JAVIK: _I wish to, as you humans say, 'place my money where my mouth is'._

There was a distinct pause in the time James needed to respond. Kaidan grinned. _Here, fishy fishy..._

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-38420100-VEGA-J: _Are you serious? I thought you said games of chance were punishable by death in the Empire._

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-24601384-JAVIK: _Yes, but as you say, we are no longer in the Empire._

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-38420100-VEGA-J: _I didn't even know you had money._

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-24601384-JAVIK: _The commander has given me funds to purchase items that will make my quarters more comfortable._

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-38420100-VEGA-J: _Oh. Well, okay. So you think you know when Alenko and Shepard will finally do the nasty, huh?_

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-24601384-JAVIK: _Yes._

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-38420100-VEGA-J: _Did you do that freaky Prothean reading trick on them? Think you got the inside scoop?_

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-24601384-JAVIK: _I do not know what you mean by 'inside scoop'. If it means what I think it does... then that would be telling._

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-38420100-VEGA-J: _Right, right. Well, tell me when you think it's going to happen, and transfer your credits to this account._

A long alphanumeric code was sent to Kaidan's omni-tool; he approved the transaction after sending in the time.

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-38420100-VEGA-J: _Holy shit! The commander gave you that much?!_

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-24601384-JAVIK: _Shepard is generous, and I have not spent much of it._

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-38420100-VEGA-J: _And you think it's going to happen tonight, huh? Didn't figure you for an optimist. Or do you know something I don't?_

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-24601384-JAVIK: _I have my reasons._

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-38420100-VEGA-J: _Man, you either don't know what you've got, or you're really that confident you'll win._

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-24601384-JAVIK: _Perhaps. One more thing: I would ask that you keep my involvement in your game a secret from the others. Nor should you speak of it to me. The synthetic has eyes everywhere._

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-38420100-VEGA-J: _Why?_

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-24601384-JAVIK: _The revelation might skew the odds, given that they know of my sensory ability. They might believe I have special knowledge, as you thought, when it is simply an educated guess, based upon my observations of the humans._

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-38420100-VEGA-J: _Oh, right, yeah, good point. Yeah, I can do that._

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-24601384-JAVIK: _That is all._

ALLIANCE-NRMDY-38420100-VEGA-J: _Okay, talk to you later._

Kaidan shut down his omni-tool and laughed for a good ten minutes.


	3. Chapter 3

"Major Alenko," EDI said, breaking into Kaidan's reverie, "you wanted to know when Commander Shepard returned?"

"Yeah. Is she back?"

"She is currently in the process of decontaminating in the airlock."

Kaidan checked the time on his omni-tool; it was 1700, an hour before their date. "Thanks for the heads-up, EDI."

After waiting about ten minutes, and failing to take in a word of the book he'd been reading to pass the time, he gave up and shut the pad down. Picking up the long, narrow box sitting next to him on the couch, he walked out of starboard observation, stuffing his free hand into his pocket to keep from fidgeting as he headed towards the elevator.

He was ready; he had planned for his date with as much rigor, attention to detail, and discipline as he would for a covert spec-ops mission, though the goal would hopefully involve a bed and a naked commander, not just a completed mission objective and a commendation in his file.

While trying to imagine the kind of form that would have a place for _broke regs, slept with commanding officer, didn't regret it at all, deserves a medal_ , he felt someone nearly yank the box out from under his arm. Combat reflexes took over, and he spun away as his barrier sprang to life around him, one hand raised to form a mnemonic, the other clutching the box close. The would-be thief was wise enough to freeze in place, three-fingered hands raised to show they were empty.

"Garrus!" Kaidan snapped, letting his barrier subside. "What the hell are you trying to pull? And how the hell can a turian in full armor sneak up on me, anyway?"

Garrus's mandibles fluttered in the turian equivalent of a grin as he leaned against the wall next to the elevator. "I was curious, and I wanted to take a closer look. As to your second question - turians naturally walk around on tiptoes, and, well, it's obvious even to a non-human that you've had something on your mind all day."

Kaidan scowled at the other man as he attempted to smooth out the wrinkles their brief struggle had left on the box. "You, of all people, should know not to take a biotic by surprise - I could've thrown you into the wall!"

"What can I say - I like living dangerously." Garrus pointed at the scars on his face to illustrate the point. 

Punching the button to summon the elevator, Kaidan growled, "You could've just asked me."

"Not as fun."

"Or asked Liara." Kaidan snorted. "Hell, she probably knew what I'd buy before I did."

"Even less fun. Besides, she's still on the Citadel - wall-to-wall meetings." Garrus glanced at him, mandibles flared. "But if my eyes aren't mistaken... that looks like wrapping paper from a pretty exclusive florist shop on the Citadel."

Kaidan shuffled the box around to his other side, away from Garrus's scrutiny - and reach. "What of it?" Damn, the elevator sure was taking its sweet time.

"Hmm, I wonder who they could be for?" Garrus teased.

The elevator finally arrived; Kaidan stepped in and glared at the turian. "Don't you have something to go calibrate?"

"If only I could calibrate your love life, right?"

Kaidan's eyes nearly crossed at the comparison of his love life to a giant gun, and he wasn't sure whether to be insulted or flattered. "I... don't think I'll answer that one."

"You know, if you need some tips or some good lines, I can help," the other man suggested.

The rumble of laughter started deep in Kaidan's chest, rolling up his diaphragm despite his best efforts to keep it down, but at least he managed to turn it into a coughing fit instead. "Garrus, if you're talking about that old 'reach and flexibility' chestnut, I think you need to come up with a new one."

"Huh," Garrus grumped, somehow managing to look offended with a face covered in plates. "It's not the age that matters - it's how you use it. Say, maybe you should see Chakwas for that cough - Shepard wouldn't want you coming down with a cold, right?"

"Uh-huh," Kaidan said, humoring his friend. "Yeah, I'll do that."

"Hey, Kaidan... good luck."

Shooting the turian a suspicious look, he said, "Thanks." Then he waited.

Garrus's mandibles fluttered again. "You'll need it."

"Ass." Kaidan made a rude gesture - there were some things that crossed species boundaries; Garrus just laughed until the doors closed. Then he heard the turian asking someone, _What's a chestnut?_

Taking a deep breath, Kaidan pressed the button for the captain's cabin, then released it in a long, slow exhalation to dispel the panic that suddenly welled up and ambushed him. With all of the steps he'd planned, somehow he'd forgotten to write down what he should say; everything that came to mind sounded so corny he cringed, and now there was no time.

The elevator, usually so slow it seemed to take a whole galactic cycle just to get to the next floor, was quick to open its doors, revealing the small landing in front of Shepard's quarters. Wiping his sweaty palms on his thighs, he stepped out and knocked on the door. _Ready or not, here I come._ And if he was lucky, there'd be a lot of that later. A whole lot.

"Kaidan!" Shepard said, looking surprised when she greeted him at the door. Her hair and skin were wet, as if she'd just come from the shower; she wore only a simple black shirt and trousers, and her feet were bare. "Come on in. What's up?"

"I, uh, I wanted to give you something," he said as he walked into the cabin, and handed her the box.

"What's this?" she asked with a puzzled smile as she took it.

"Open it, and you'll see."

While the commander occupied herself with undoing the ribbon and the wrapping paper, he slipped a couple of smaller packages - for later - onto the shelf that held the hamster cage, one of the few indulgences she'd allowed herself, like the model ships and expensive tea. And himself, Kaidan supposed. A small gasp told him she'd opened the box, and he turned to see her stunned expression, so that he could memorize it.

"A dozen roses?" Shepard said, and stared at him, apparently struck speechless - and without a turian Councilor around to tell her Reapers didn't exist.

He shrugged and smiled, drinking in her radiant face as she buried her nose into the blood-red blossoms and took a deep breath of the fragrance. She should look like that all the time. "What can I say? I'm old fashioned."

"Flowers all the way from Earth... they must've set you back quite a bit."

"Worth every credit to see you smile," he assured her.

Putting the box down next to her computer terminal, she threw her arms around his neck; a static shock popped and burned for a brief moment against his skin, but he was used to it. "You are _such_ a romantic," she declared, and kissed him.

The clever little tongue that she'd used to seduce treaties from both the krogan and the turians first teased at a corner of his mouth, persuading his lips to part, little by little, with moist little swipes. Shepard smelled of soap and shampoo, and she tasted of cinnamon and spice, and the heat of her skin soaked into him through both of their shirts when he wrapped his arms tight around her.

When he yielded with joy to her unspoken demand, then turned the tables by capturing her with his own tongue and teeth, she made a hungry little sound deep in her throat that weakened both his knees and his resolve. For a wild, lust-filled moment, Kaidan thought about throwing his carefully laid plans for the evening out the airlock, to instead take his commander to bed, burrow into a nest of blankets, and make love to her until they both forgot their names.

Then he remembered how bright and happy she looked when he gave her the flowers, and realized how rare it was for her to be given a frivolous gift that wasn't alcohol, something that had no relation to the war, with Reapers, or Cerberus. Well, there was that small crystal she said the female krogan shaman had given her, but even that was a reminder of pain and struggle and suffering.

With reluctance, he withdrew, breathing hard, but only enough to see her face; he wasn't ready to let go just yet. "Why don't you go get dressed? I'll find something to put the flowers in."

The pupils of Shepard's gray eyes were dilated, and a faint blush darkened her cheeks. "We could always stay in, and I could cook dinner," she suggested, a little short of breath herself.

Great minds thought alike, apparently. "And I bet it'd taste better than anything a five-star restaurant on the Citadel could come up with, but I don't want you to do any work. I want you to relax, take a breather, you know?"

She smirked. "Anyone eating one of _my_ meals would be so relaxed, they'd be positively torpid."

He laughed. "I remember." A line from one of his father's vid letters suddenly came to mind: _She can_ cook? _Don't let her get away!_ "But let me spoil you tonight."

"I have to finish getting dressed, and I can't do that if you're still holding me so tightly," Shepard teased, though there was something in her eyes and the way she was running her fingers through his hair that said she didn't really mind.

"Right." Kaidan let her go and took up the roses, letting the thorns poke into his palms to remind him he had this thing called self-control, and that it was important to his plans to have some. "Do you have anything I can put these in?"

There wasn't, but they improvised, using a tall drinking glass she found in a cabinet. He went to the bathroom to fill it with water, keeping his gaze averted from the shower in an effort to suppress the erotic fantasies insisting on playing across his mind's eye in all of their lurid, sexy details. _If you keep this up - and_ that, _too_ , he told his libido, _I'll have to use it myself_. His libido was unimpressed by the threat.

While they were soldiers, and soldiers were used to having no privacy whatsoever when they dressed, this time was different; he felt shy, even though he'd seen her before in nothing but her dog tags, and looked around her cabin instead of watching her put on her makeup. There were no personal touches that he could see in the bedroom section, he realized, no imprint of the one who lived here; all of those were in the office, consisting of the model ships, her hamster, hard copy reports, and the messy pile of data pads. Well, now there was a makeshift vase filled with a dozen roses on the low table. It was a start.

It was less than five minutes later when Kaidan turned from the empty fish tank - why a fish tank on a _warship_ , he wondered - when she called him. He blinked, taking in the immaculate, crisp dress blues she was wearing.

"Well, now I feel under dressed," he said without thinking, feeling rumpled and shabby in his BDUs compared to those elegant lines and sharp creases.

She smirked as she led the way to the elevator. "Not under dressed _enough_ , Major."

He leaned over and breathed into her ear, his voice deep and hoarse with promise, "Later." Unable to resist, he licked at her earlobe, and heard her sharp inhalation as he took her hand. In a more normal voice, he added, "Have I told you how much I love seeing you in your dress blues?"

Shepard raised her brows as she pressed the button for the elevator. "No, but... tell me more."

"I, uh... I have a real weakness for a woman in uniform, Shepard." And he did, considering he was the only one who would ever see the entirety of what that uniform was hiding. "Especially when you look so hot in them."

"One of the reasons you joined the military, huh?"

"Yeah," Kaidan said before he could stop himself. "I mean, no! I, I mean..." he sputtered.

The commander laughed like a delighted child, and leaned over to kiss him on the cheek. "Kaidan, you haven't changed a bit."

"You wouldn't have it any other way," he said, pulling her into the elevator when the doors opened.

"No," Shepard agreed, and squeezed his hand. "I wouldn't."

By unspoken agreement, they stopped holding hands when the elevator opened, even though the existence of James's betting pool meant they had betrayed themselves somehow. Kaidan knew he was fooling himself if he thought no one would notice; any of the crew wandering on the Presidium would be able to see them having dinner at Apollo's, holding hands - and he fully intended to hold her hand - which was not what two ranking officers serving together on the same ship should do. He couldn't really bring himself to care very much - and he used to care a lot about regs, when did he stop? - but it would be best if they exercised discretion on the ship.

They made a clean escape off the bridge, with only Joker's knowing _Have fun!_ to speed them on their way. He breathed out a silent sigh of relief as they stepped out of the airlock; he'd been dreading the moment when EDI would alert Shepard to some emergency or a vid-comm call from Hackett, and he could hardly believe it hadn't happened, that they'd gotten away.

"Ready?" Kaidan asked, taking the commander's hand and tucking it in his arm with a proprietary air.

Shepard's lips curved in a broad, enigmatic smile. "Lead on."

The journey from the docking bay to the restaurant was all a bit of a blur, distracted as he was by the way the commander pressed against him, the heat radiating from her body, even through their uniforms, her thigh rubbing against his, and the touch of her warm, callused fingers on his bare arm.

The only jarring note that impinged on his awareness was the brightness of the Presidium, which was blazing with artificial sunlight from the simulated blue sky above, when it should've been evening. It would've been more romantic to see the stars at night, with maybe a moon or two, but considering how often he'd caught her shooting sidelong glances at him, it would probably be a waste.

At Apollo's, a salarian waiter directed them to a table and handed them menu pads; Kaidan remembered enough of his manners to pull out a chair for Shepard and seat her before sitting down himself.

"Wow, pretty good selection," Kaidan commented as he studied the menu and scrolled through it. "I didn't think they could get supplies for half the dishes listed here, what with the war and everything."

Her smile took on a cynical twist. "Considering the prices, I wouldn't be surprised if they're tapping into the black market for most of it."

He shrugged. "Well, however they did it, I'm just glad you were willing to take the time out to do this. We could both use a sanity check, I think."

"I remember making a promise to you, Kaidan - three years ago for you, but it was just one for me," Shepard said, her warm, rough hand covering his. "Whatever I have left after the crew, after the mission... is yours."

Turning his hand palm up, Kaidan curled his fingers around hers. "Considering it was one of the most memorable nights in my life - how could I forget? But when that life flashed in front of my eyes on Mars -" he felt her hand tighten on his at the mention "- I realized there weren't enough of those nights - not enough moments like this, with people that I care about." _That I love_ , he wanted to add, but he couldn't quite get those particular words out just yet.

"I know what you mean," she murmured, a hint of rue in her tone. "Things have been pretty crazy lately. With the war, Cerberus, and my biotics nearly getting out of control, I haven't really been able to live up to that promise."

He stared down at their hands, unable to bring himself to look her in the eye. "I... I didn't exactly make it easy for you."

Reaching across the table with her other hand to tilt his chin up so that he couldn't help but look at her, she said, "We're here now, aren't we?" Her sweet, radiant smile made his heart melt - there was nothing mysterious about her sentiments in it.

Kaidan leaned into her touch as she caressed his cheek. "Yeah. We are. It's amazing, really, when I think about it," he said with a self-deprecating chuckle. "When you've made it your mission to save the galaxy from the Reapers, I was afraid you wouldn't be willing to take even half a second to relax."

"As long as you're with me, how could I resist? Besides, you've been working hard, too." Shepard traced the lines on his forehead before taking her hand away.

"Trying to butter me up? I'm not that easy, you know." His fingers tickled her palm and pulse point. "It might take a nice steak sandwich, too."

Her gray eyes flared with heat before it was hidden by a sweep of her eyelashes. "Well, now that I know your weakness, what else would you like?"

"A shot of whiskey and a good old Canadian lager." Kaidan smiled to mask a mild wave of homesickness. "Think they have it?"

An intent look flickered across her face, as if she were committing the information to memory. "I'm afraid they're more likely to have batarian shard wine," she said with a small grimace as she perused the menu. "I've tried it. It's better than vinegar and piss - barely."

The waiter came back to take their orders; Kaidan ordered a beer - not Canadian lager, sadly, but at least it had been brewed by humans on Elysium, while Shepard ordered a carbonated wine popular with salarians. For the main course, a grilled porterhouse steak - medium rare - mashed potatoes and coleslaw for him, and lasagne with ground varren meat for her; with each additional dish they ordered, the salarian's already wide eyes grew even wider, but it was just a typical meal for two hungry biotics.

"That reminds me..." For a moment, he wasn't seeing the Presidium, but the sun setting over an ocean, and the homesickness grew until it felt sharp as a knife. It was difficult to drag his attention back to the present, back to Shepard. "I drank more than a few beers on my parents' balcony, looking over English Bay. Beautiful view, wasn't it?"

"It was," Shepard agreed, the same nostalgia he felt reflected on her face. "I'm glad you convinced me to see Earth and meet your parents after that mission on Luna."

"Feels like it happened a million years ago." It was a time that felt innocent and carefree, when they were young and beautiful, and the threat of Saren and the geth seemed distant and far away. They hadn't known about Sovereign's true nature, yet.

"We'll see it again, Kaidan," Shepard promised, her rough voice gentle as it broke into his thoughts.

_It won't be the same. It'll never be the same._ Kaidan managed to stop himself from saying the words; if anyone understood the devastation he felt, it was surely a survivor from Mindoir.

Making an effort to put it all out of his mind, at least for tonight, he said, "I know. This might seem strange, but... I feel good about our chances."

"Yeah?" The commander seemed surprised, as if she didn't know just how inspiring she was to him.

Maybe she didn't - or maybe his hope and belief in her were just more things that only added to her burden.

"Yeah," he echoed her. "Helps me sleep better at night."

Concern clouded her expression. "You're not sleeping?"

"Probably about as much as you have." Kaidan reached out and traced the dark circles under her eyes. "Been feeling a little restless. I've been thinking, not just about the war, but... about us."

Shepard gave him an encouraging nod. "Us," she prompted.

He leaned forward, putting his elbows on the table even though it was bad manners, and took hold of her other hand. "I love you, Shepard. I always have. And I want to understand what this is between us, and I... I want to make it real. I, I mean, not that what we had before wasn't real - but I want more." He couldn't stop a nervous laugh from escaping. "I guess that sounds pretty selfish, now that I say it out loud. It was a lot less awkward in my head."

She took a long time to answer, time in which both his panic and dread grew, but it turned out she was just gathering her thoughts. "Ever since I entered the military, I've followed orders, obeyed rules. Even when I bent them or broke them, it was to stay true to the oaths I've made - to the Alliance, to my family, to myself."

Her expression was rueful, but full of wonder, too. "You've always been the exception to that, no matter how many times I told myself that it was wrong to feel that way for a subordinate, no matter how much trouble I'd get us both into. I guess what I'm saying is that I love you, too, Kaidan," she said with fond exasperation, giving his hands a reassuring squeeze. "I thought you knew that. And I guess that makes me selfish, too."

Kaidan somehow managed to speak around the lump in his throat, and his heart felt far too big for his chest. "That... that makes me so happy."

This time, it was Shepard who looked away. "I'm sorry - I should've said something sooner. But I didn't want to pressure you - I didn't want you to think I wanted to be with you just because the world's ending, and I know you still had doubts about me."

The old shame and guilt made him feel like a complete heel, made worse by her apology. "Hey," he said, getting her attention. "I'm the one who should be sorry, after all those things I said to you on Mars, and after that, I - I almost shot you. I... I should've known better."

She shook her head. "Don't be - you didn't say anything I haven't thought of myself." That was Shepard - always so damned reasonable.

There was a soft, polite cough, interrupting them before they could reiterate yet another round of apologies. Kaidan looked up to see their salarian waiter, both spindly arms burdened with trays of food, and let go of Shepard's hands so that the poor guy could set them down on the table.

"Hey, Shepard," he said, once the waiter had left, "the thing about being so happy is that I'd like to share that happiness."

She paused in the middle of spreading the napkin on her lap. "Oh?"

Deliberately deepening his voice, he said, "If you know what I mean."

"I don't know..." Shepard said, though her smirk indicated otherwise. "What _do_ you mean?"

"I mean that there are benefits to that happiness," Kaidan answered, taking a sip of his beer to hide his smile. "But more on that later."

Her eyes narrowed to predatory slits. "Later? We have to get back to the ship. ASAP."

Feigning disappointment - and probably not doing a very good job of it, what with the grin that kept trying to break free - he shook his head and said, "It'd be a shame to waste all this good food, not to mention this beer. Sorry, but I'm going to take my time."

"What'd you call it? A sanity check? More like a libido check!" she said, trying to give him a thwarted glare, but the grin won out, and they shared a laugh.

They ate like soldiers, with a minimum of conversation and time spent on the task, though he did cut some of his steak and offered it to her, and she gave him some of her lasagne. The rest of the dishes were split up in a similar way, giving each other indulgent smiles and encouragements like _This is great, try some!_ and _I know you like this one, go on_.

Replete with good food and good company, Kaidan wiped his mouth with his napkin, leaned back in his chair, and asked, "Well?"

"It was great," the commander said with approval as she surveyed the empty plates; the devastation had been complete and thorough.

He called the waiter for the check, and tried not to wince too much when he saw the damage. "Ready to get out of here?" he asked as he cleared the transaction on his omni-tool, as well as leaving a generous tip for the salarian.

"Well, since you paid for dinner, I suppose it's only fair I pay for dessert." She rose to her feet and held out her hand. "Come on."

Kaidan looked up at her, at the glint of merriment in her eyes, then took his commander's rough, callused hand, pressed it against his face, and kissed her palm. Shepard's eyes turned scorching, and her lips stretched in a slow smile that warmed him up inside like a shot of whiskey on a cold autumn day.

"Or maybe we should just skip dessert and head straight back to the _Normandy_ ," she murmured in a voice that was even more smoky than usual, her thumb stroking his bottom lip in a suggestive way.

Kaidan swallowed, his mouth dry. What that voice could do to him shouldn't be legal. "I've got no objections," he said, releasing her hand before he succumbed to the impulse to suck on her finger.

She pinched his chin and smirked before grabbing his hand, pulling him to his feet. "Oh, wait, you said you wanted to take your time, didn't you?" she said in a tone of mock realization.

"You are _such_ a tease," he accused her.

"Pot, kettle, black," Shepard agreed, unrepentant, as her free hand flicked to him, then to herself.

She started to pull away, but Kaidan kept his grip on her strong fingers, not caring in the least that he was holding hands with his commander in full view of, well, everyone. Shepard's smile broadened into a grin.

With his hand in her warm, dry grip, his awareness of her scent, and the lassitude that always came upon him after a good, large meal, it was not until they were in the elevator that he thought to question their destination. "Where are you taking me? I thought we were going to that bakery on the Presidium."

"That overpriced tourist trap?" Shepard scoffed. "I don't think so. For our first date... well, ever, I had something more... special in mind."

He raised an eyebrow at her. "Special, huh?"

"Mhm." Even after three years, Shepard's smile was still an enigma - and it hadn't lost its power to take his breath away.

The elevator deposited them in Zakera Ward, and they had to shoulder their way through a crowd of people waiting to get on. He smiled when not one of them gave them a second glance; none of them cared that he was holding hands with Commander Shepard. Then he took in the view the mob of waiting passengers had been blocking: the Citadel arms, stretching out into the night sky.

"Shepard, look! Do you remember when we first came here three years ago?" he said, tugging her towards the observation window. The view was as spectacular and breathtaking as he remembered; Zakera Ward was set further back than the _Normandy's_ docking bay, showing more of the arms.

Her voice was quiet and pensive. "Yeah... with Ash. Remember how she teased you?" Letting go of his hand, she propped her forearms on the windowsill and stared out at the lights; as they were eclipsed by the shadows of speeding air cars, the constellations delineating the Citadel arms looked as if they were winking like real stars, though he doubted she was really seeing any of it.

Kaidan slipped his arm around her waist as he rested on the cool ledge next to her, and felt her lean into him. "Yeah."

He gave her a moment to gather her thoughts back from where they'd obviously gone across time and space, then he pressed a kiss against her temple. "Come on... Ashley wouldn't want us to mope."

Turning her head, Shepard pressed her face into his neck; he felt her smile against his skin, and her warm breath feathered his cheek when she said, "Yeah."

When she turned away, Kaidan kept his arm wrapped around her waist, and she didn't pull back. Out of the commander's sight, he held out a fist towards the observation window; a breeze blew against his hand, and he imagined the gunnery chief had rapped her knuckles against his from across some otherworldly divide. It was probably just a draft from the ventilators, but...

_I hope you're looking out for us, Ash._

Zakera Ward seemed more crowded, busier and louder than the last time he was here, worse even than morning rush hour in downtown Vancouver; more than once, the press of bodies forced Shepard close against him - not that he minded one bit. It was just unfortunate that the smell of so many people of so many different races didn't mix well in an enclosed space.

"So where are we going?" Kaidan asked, needing to speak right into Shepard's ear in order to be heard above the noise.

An elcor chose that moment to pass through, shoving them both into a holo-sign, though he - or maybe she - was very polite and apologetic about it. Kaidan wrinkled his nose; elcor might communicate through their pheromones, but the smell was as strong and pungent as a wet dog to his uninformed olfactory sense.

"Sorry, Kaidan, we're almost there," Shepard said, peeling herself off the wall, and gave him an apologetic look as she tried to pat out the wrinkles in her uniform. "Maybe this wasn't such a great idea after all... I should've realized the lower wards would be teeming with people hiding from the war, and I know how you hate crowds and noise."

"It's okay, really," he was quick to assure her. "The Presidium is so clean and open, it's easy to forget the rest of the Citadel's not like that."

"It's only going to get worse - no," the commander cut herself off with a shake of her head. "Dammit, we're not going to talk about the war, or the Reapers, or Cerberus - this is about us," she muttered, though Kaidan wasn't sure if she was talking to him or to herself.

The scent of something fragrant wafted through the air, somehow cutting through the smell of too many people in too small a space, and he realized they were down by the food market section. The area was unfamiliar to him, since Shepard had been more interested in weapons and armor than anything else, but now the mystery of where she'd gotten the ingredients to make those incredible brownies was solved. Where else could she get them but the Citadel, with Earth under attack?

"Here we are," Shepard announced, pulling Kaidan over to a tiny little shop with a colorful pastel pink-striped awning.

The store was just as small inside, and crammed full of patrons, young and old alike. Shepard waited in line like the rest of them, even though she probably could've cut to the front if she wanted to.

"Doesn't it smell _wonderful_ in here?" she said, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath of the sweet-flavored air.

Kaidan took in the rare expression of peace on his commander's face. "Yeah... it does." 

"How may this one serve you?" a pleasant male voice said from behind the counter.

Kaidan stared as the hanar - whose coloring matched the pink in the awning outside exactly - stretched out its long tentacles towards the customers in front of them, ice cream cones clutched in all four. _Okay, now I've seen everything._

"The usual, Menshi," Shepard said, her hand striking fast as a snake when he tried to pay, and held out her omni-tool to transfer the credits. "I told you, this is _my_ treat."

"Okay, okay," Kaidan said with a laugh, and rubbed his smarting wrist.

"Of course, Commander," the hanar said.

"You've been here before?" Kaidan asked in a whisper while the hanar did mysterious things that seemed to involve a disturbing amount of tentacle waving and stuff crunching behind the counter.

Shepard ducked her head, a charming blush on her cheeks. "Yeah. It's, um, sort of my secret vice." She shrugged one shoulder, embarrassed. "Other people go drown their sorrows in some seedy bar - I get ice cream. Good thing I'm a biotic, or I'd be as fat as a volus by now."

"Don't tell me - 'I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my favorite ice cream shop on the Citadel'," he teased.

She laughed. "Hell yes!"

The hanar interrupted whatever else Kaidan might've said when it presented the commander with a cone piled high with two generous scoops of ice cream: vanilla on top, chocolate on the bottom, and all of it covered in hot fudge and crushed nuts. "Please enjoy, Commander. This one hopes you will have a pleasant day."

"Thanks," Shepard said as she took the cone, and pulled Kaidan out of the shop.

"Hey, where's mine?" he protested. He tried to turn back, but the customers who'd waited behind them had already closed the gap.

She gave him a smile that was equal parts sweetness and wickedness, and took a long, leisurely lick of the ice cream. Kaidan sucked a groan back behind his teeth, and his pants grew uncomfortable as he imagined those lips somewhere else entirely. Then she held out the cone to him in a silent invitation. 

Holding her gaze, he leaned down and licked at the same place she had; the dark, sinful hot fudge and the cold, creamy taste of vanilla and chocolate mingled in his mouth, and the chopped almonds added a wonderful crunchy texture.

Her eyes crinkled at him. "You've got some chocolate on your mouth. Here, let me..." 

Kaidan wasn't prepared when she darted forward, swiping her hot tongue across his lips; pressing the advantage like the brilliant tactician she was, she invaded his parted mouth and stole his breath - just like she'd stolen his heart. The hot spiciness of Shepard's cinnamon swirled in chaotic joy with the fudge, chocolate and vanilla, blazing a trail down to the pit of his stomach and warming him from his head all the way down to his toes.

When they both broke apart to breathe, he found he had her pressed up against the ice cream shop's menu sign, one hand on the back of her head, fingers tangled in her short hair, and the other on the small of her back. The ice cream he'd eaten only made her warm body seem even warmer, and his muscles untensed as he basked in it, his heart at ease like it hadn't been for a very long time.

"Anla..." he breathed, and felt her quick inhale when he said her first name. He took it slower this time, savoring her scent and the taste of her as he nibbled on the corner of her mouth, his tongue touching hers as she parted her lips for him.

"Kaidan?" The breathless way she said his name with that husky voice sent a shiver down his back.

"Mm?" He leaned back a little, enough to see her smiling lips were swollen from their kisses.

Her quiet laugh puffed against his cheeks. "The ice cream is starting to melt, there're little kids watching, and Menshi is too polite to tell us we're blocking the door."

Kaidan stole a bite of the softening ice cream, his teeth crunching on the crushed almonds as he pulled her away from the shop. "Then I guess we'd better get back to the _Normandy_."

Shepard licked at the cone, where some of the melting chocolate was threatening to drip onto her hand. "I thought you wanted to take your time," she said with a self-satisfied smirk.

"I changed my mind!" he retorted as he tightened his arm around her waist, eeling his way through the crowds until he reached the nearest elevator. "Bay D-24," he told the VI.

Now that that was taken care of, Kaidan turned his attention back to Shepard, who was licking at the diminishing ice cream cone with an oh-so-innocent expression that fit her about as well as a pink polka-dot pattern on a Reaper destroyer. The momentum of the other passengers had forced them towards the back of the elevator, which was just as well, when the commander held out the ice cream towards him again with a coy smile on her face.

"We should finish it before it all melts," Shepard said as she licked the fudge off her lips. "Think we can make it back to the ship before that happens?"

He couldn't stop himself from kissing that smug smile off her face, nor chasing bits of almonds that had gotten stuck to her upper lip. "Sounds like a tough mission, but someone's got to do it -"

Shepard kissed him back, cutting off any further words - as if he could still remember what he wanted to say. Then he recoiled when something cold was smeared on his cheeks and nose.

"Hey!" Kaidan protested, but she held away the ice cream cone before he could grab it. Then she laughed, and he just stared at her, mesmerized, as all the years and cares and the weight of the galaxy fell away from her face.

She grasped his chin, holding him still so that she could lick the ice cream off his face, and while he was distracted by the warm swipes of her tongue against his cheeks, he didn't notice her wandering hand. The circles she was massaging on his nape, just below his bio-amp port, lulled him into complacency, and he paid no mind to the fact that same hand was now sliding from his neck, down his back.

His indignant cry of _Shepard!_ was sucked from his mouth and into hers when she suddenly grabbed his ass. "Shepard," Kaidan hissed, feeling a blush bloom on his face when she gave him a squeeze, "we're in an elevator. _With other people._ "

The commander just smirked, and licked the last of the ice cream off his nose before turning her attention back to the cone, which had been decimated down to the crispy cup by their combined efforts. Well, two could play at that game - and he had both hands free.

After a glance around to make sure no one was looking, he pushed her against the back of the elevator and grabbed _her_ ass. This time, Kaidan was the one who stole the breath from Shepard's mouth as she stiffened in surprise, and he grinned against her lips. Giving her firm, round buttocks a squeeze - there wasn't an ounce of spare fat on her - he used his hold to pull her hard against him - and against something hard.

"Do you know how many times I stared at your ass when I was following you, way back when we were first starting out on the SR-1?" he whispered into her ear, her hair tickling his face. "You've got no right to look that sexy in your armor."

Her eyes darkened, the color of an overcast sky dimming to gun-metal gray, pupils dilated. "I love it when you talk dirty, Kaidan," she purred, and then she bit down on his bottom lip. "Now help me finish this so I have both hands free."

"Aye aye."

The ice cream cone didn't stand a chance with two eager, enthusiastic mouths tearing at the crunchy shell, even though Kaidan kept pausing after each bite to kiss her. He licked at the vanilla and chocolate painted in messy blotches on her lips and chin in their hurry to finish, a cool contrast to the heat building between them where they were pressed so close together, but his efforts were hindered somewhat when she tried to do the same for him. They were down to the pointy bit when he felt the spot between his shoulderblades itching, and he turned around to see a couple of salarians staring at them with clinical dispassion.

"Can't be hygienic," one said with a disapproving blink of his eyes.

The other gave this pronouncement a grave nod. "Germs could be problematic."

Kaidan scowled, giving Tweedledum and Tweedledee his best bristling-browed glare, and was happy to see that what could cow recalcitrant biotic recruits also worked on salarians; the pair scrambled out at the next stop. Then he swooped down on the forlorn remnant of the cone, devouring it with a single savage bite; Shepard snatched her fingers away before they could disappear into his mouth, too - not that she was ever in any real danger.

"Mission accomplished," he mumbled as he crunched down with diligence.

"Don't talk with your mouth full," she admonished him, then undermined the scold when she used her tongue to swipe bits of cone and ice cream that had escaped, sticking to his lips and dripping down his chin, from what turned out to be an overly ambitious mouthful.

"Now arriving at docking bay D-24," the VI announced.

Kaidan pulled himself away from her alluring lips to see that the elevator had emptied in the time it had taken to arrive at their destination, leaving them alone. Attempting to peel the rest of himself away, the better to get back to the ship, he groaned, and pulled her back against him.

Crap. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all.

"What's wrong?" Shepard asked, looking confused by the abrupt movement.

"I can't go back like this!" he hissed. Cheeks flaming, he pointed down at the front of his trousers.

"Oh? Ooh." She reached for him, but he grabbed her wrist before she could make things better - no, worse, definitely worse; he'd already given some unnamed C-Sec minion manning the cameras a show, and he wasn't interested in humiliating himself.

Kaidan sucked in a surprised breath when he felt dark energy form, light and gentle enough that there were no biotic flares; he shivered, the hairs rising up on his body, as it swiftly moved to envelop his barrier and began to sink through, but her goal wasn't to give pleasure - at least not deliberately. He only just stifled a startled shout when he felt a tendril of her biotics pushing down his erection, enough for it not to show.

"Don't worry, Kaidan - I've got your back. And front." Shepard grinned, then pulled him out of the elevator.

"Nhgh, n-not so fast," he complained, dragging his heels as he attempted to walk normally without exacerbating his... condition. The friction of the cloth on his aching flesh as he moved was _killing_ him.

Though he relied on her to steer him while he ran through every omni-tool design he knew of in his head, he was sweating by the time they got to the airlock, and he tried not to whimper at the thought of the long walk to the ship's elevator. The commander's arm dropped from where it had been wrapped around his waist, but he could still feel the currents of her biotics rippling around him as they waited for the decontamination procedure to finish. 

The tiny corner of Kaidan's mind that wasn't preoccupied with a recalcitrant part of his body marveled at her fine control of her power as she used it to move him in the right direction, even catching him when he stumbled on the shallow steps leading down from the bridge to the CIC. Since he couldn't hear Joker's jeering voice, the pilot must be at Purgatory with EDI, thank all the deities for small favors.

Please, God, don't let anyone stop them on the way...

"Kaidan, are you all right?"

Damnitdamnitdamnit. 

He directed his attention back outward, and saw Liara framed in the elevator, staring at him with a perplexed expression that would've been cute if _she weren't standing in his way_. Why couldn't she have stayed in her office, with her nose buried in Shadow Broker reports like usual?

He smiled, though it felt more like a grimace, and said through gritted teeth, "Fine, I'm fine."

"But your face is all red, and you're walking a little hunched over," the asari observed, sounding concerned. "Perhaps Dr. Chakwas should take a look at you -"

"No!" Kaidan coughed, subsiding when Liara stared at him, and said in a more normal voice, "No. I'll be okay, thanks."

"Don't worry, Kaidan's just had a little too much to drink," the commander assured the other woman; butter wouldn't have melted in her mouth.

"Oh! Should I walk you to crew quarters, then?" Liara offered, choosing that moment to be solicitous and kind.

That was unfair - the archaeologist was always nice to people who weren't trying to kill her or hurt her friends, Kaidan reminded himself. It was just that her timing was _rotten_.

"I'll handle it, Liara," Shepard said. "I'll put him to bed, don't you worry," she added, a certain smug quality in her voice. "Go on, get outta here. I'm sure you were looking forward to some time away from all those monitors and meetings."

"Well, Garrus and Tali did invite me out for drinks, and my father said she'll give us a special discount. If you're sure?" Liara hesitated, while Kaidan restrained himself from shouting at her to just go away, or worse, using his biotics to throw her out.

"I'm sure. Go on." The commander took him by the elbow and pulled him into the elevator.

Inside, he collapsed against the wall, wiping the sweat pouring down his face with a shaky hand. "God, that was close," he croaked. "I thought she'd never let us go."

Shepard chuckled, the hoarse little sound not exactly helping with his self-control, then hit the button for the captain's cabin. "She's grown up a lot in the past three years, but I guess there're some things she's still clueless about. Liara's smart, though - she'll figure it out soon enough. But enough about Liara."

Then she faced him, her eyes predatory, her smile wicked, as she stepped close and braced her arms on either side of him. Her biotics dispersed all of a sudden, causing his erection to knock against the fabric of his trousers, and he groaned at the sensation.

Screwing his eyes shut, Kaidan thought about electronic counter measures, diagrams of various geth platforms, the omni-tool microframe speed of a Logic Arrest versus a Savant, anything but the scent of her skin, her warm breath feathering his face, and the heat he could feel radiating from her body like hot summer sunlight. Visions of circuit boards shattered, running though his fingers like water, as she kissed him, moist tongue teasing his mouth, trying to pry apart the lips he'd pressed hard together to hold in the needy whine.

The sound of the elevator doors opening didn't register until the commander stopped kissing him and grabbed his arm. His eyes flew open when she tried to pull him into her cabin, but he resisted.

"S-slow down, Shepard," he hissed as he dug in his heels, but he was dragged along by main force anyway. "I can't -"

Shepard turned, gray eyes suddenly glowing blue as her biotics flared for a brief moment, and gravity disappeared - at least for him. "No, I will _not_ slow down," she growled as she towed him behind her like a balloon into her quarters.


	4. Chapter 4

Well, it was better, now that the fabric of his trousers wasn't abrading oversensitive skin every damned time he took a step, but if he wasn't careful, her determined, I-take-what-I-want attitude was going to undo him anyway. Her impatience was flattering, really, when he thought about it. Not that he had two brain cells to rub together right now, what with all the blood flowing to one spot on his body.

"Shepard," Kaidan began, once they were a few steps inside and the doors were closed, "you can put me down now -"

All the breath was knocked out of his lungs when she slammed him against the fish tank, and all thought flew out of his head as she slanted her mouth over his in a hungry, needy, sloppy kiss. She tasted of cinnamon and chocolate, sweetness and sin, the salarian wine a dark accompaniment to the sharp fragrance of almonds. A groan escaped him when she pressed herself close, like she wanted to get right into his skin, and a sweet, fiery agony flared a warning in his tightening groin as she grabbed his ass and ground against him.

Wrapping his arms around her and crushing her to his chest, he kissed her back with just as much fervor, mouth wandering along her jaw and down her neck. Tilting her head back with a small sigh to give him better access, she shivered and cried out when he bit down on the underside of her chin and sucked on the soft, vulnerable flesh. A primitive part of him howled with savage glee when he realized it would show the next day, and he was unable to resist taking another bite, and another; his commander was going to be sporting some mighty impressive hickeys tomorrow, and he felt no regret whatsoever.

As tight as his embrace was, Shepard was still able to move her arms enough to undo his belt and trousers, and before he knew it, her rough, callused fingers were inside his underwear and wrapped around him. All it took was her other hand cupping his balls before the tenuous threads of his control snapped, and a torrent of whispered profanity and prayers, interspersed with her name, fell from his lips as he came. Through the roaring in his ears, he heard her murmur things like _You look so beautiful when you come_ and _I love you so much_ as he thrust without shame into her hands.

When the white fire and blue flames cleared from Kaidan's sight, it took him some time to get enough air, and even more to form coherent speech. Hell, he could barely stand, he felt so boneless, and only the fish tank at his back held him up at all.

Feeling his face burn, he muttered, "God, that was - I, I haven't done that since I was, I think I was fourteen, sorry, I didn't mean to - I made such a mess -"

A gentle kiss, with only a hint of teeth, silenced his babbling; judging from the scorching look in her eyes, she didn't mind the mess at all. He whimpered when she took one sticky hand away, leaving the other in his boxers to stroke his softening cock, then he stared as she licked her fingers with slow, luxurious swipes of her tongue, just like she'd done to the ice cream cone earlier. His already wobbly knees grew even weaker; the sight was just so incredibly hot.

Without speaking, and holding his gaze, she slid down out of his limp arms, until she was kneeling in front of him, and he tried to swallow with a dry mouth when he realized what she intended. Though the dark fabric was a little wrinkled, and her short hair was a bit mussed, Shepard still looked immaculate in her uniform, ready to lead an army or give an inspiring speech. He wondered if she knew that having her wear full dress blues while going down on him was one of his more cherished fantasies - and suspected she knew now.

God, the sight of his commanding officer on the floor between his legs had to be one of the most erotic things he'd ever seen. If he wasn't careful, he was going to salute her with more than just his hand the next time they were on duty.

Shepard pulled his pants and his boxers down to his knees, exposing his hot skin to the cool air of her cabin; she kept the temperature lower than elsewhere on the ship to accommodate the heightened body heat of her biotic metabolism. Kaidan bit down on his bottom lip and let his thighs fall open as much as the constricting cloth let him, shivering with anticipation even before her mouth touched him. But she didn't do that yet, instead switching the hand she'd licked clean of his come with the one that had stayed on his cock, and began sucking on her fingers.

"Tease," he accused her, not taking his eyes off her busy lips.

"What a horrible thing to say, Kaidan," she said, pausing to smirk when she saw him trembling from the hot breath of her words caressing his groin, "when I'm the one who's making sure your pants aren't stained."

He had a witty comeback, he was sure of it, but the retort was lost in a groan when she swooped forward and licked him from tip to base, his knees threatening to give out altogether when she took his balls in her rough palm. Caught in a firm grip, she rolled them, pulling and squeezing with enough force to blur the line between pleasure and pain - just the way he liked it. 

Then his eyes damned near rolled back in his head when she sucked his cock into her hot mouth at the same time, and, as if that weren't enough to overload his senses, he felt the saliva-slick fingers of her other hand dance and tease around the puckered entrance hidden behind his testicles. Quiet curses fell from his mouth when she ducked her head, and he felt her hot, wet tongue replacing her fingers, circling, testing, then dipping within; he shuddered, feeling her breath on damp skin and her hair tickling his thighs.

"Sh-Shepard," Kaidan breathed, shaking from the pleasure, and not caring if she knew.

As if saying her name summoned her, she rose to her feet, eyes half-lidded, not quite hiding a glitter of lust as she licked her lips. Not having the strength yet to do much more than let her pull him up from his involuntary crouch before he slid off the fish tank and onto the floor, he kissed her, tasting himself on her tongue.

"Mm, Kaidan... you taste as good as I remember," Shepard purred against his mouth.

It wasn't fair that he was the only one with everything all hanging out, so he started undoing her uniform jacket. Even half out of his mind with post-orgasmic bliss, his hands still knew what to do. "Well, now it's my turn to see if you taste the same."

She smiled against his mouth at his eagerness, but caught his wrists before he could do much more than undo the braid and top button holding the front placket closed. "We can do that once you're not in danger of tripping over your own pants and breaking your neck."

"That just sounds like a poor excuse to get me naked," he complained, but began to undo the fasteners on his shirt with fingers that were still trembling a little.

"As long as it works," she retorted, dropping down on one knee to take off his boots, though she made the task harder when she pressed kisses on his bare thighs.

How did she expect him to be able to support his own weight if she insisted on making his knees weak? By relying solely on her own considerable strength, apparently, as she lifted up his left foot with one hand and pulled the boot and sock off with the other, then repeating it for the right.

Tossing his shirt to one side and kicking off his pants and underwear, Kaidan hooked his hands under her arms and surged forward, slamming her up against the divider separating the office area from the bedroom. A startled grunt escaped her when her back hit the support column, and he caught a glimpse of the surprise in her wide eyes.

Music started to play, for some reason, but he was past caring about anything other than tearing off her jacket - his impatient fingers were less than kind to the shiny gold buttons - then the tight black shirt underneath was yanked up over her head. Using the garment as a makeshift restraint, he pinned her wrists up above her head with one hand, and distracted her with bruising, sloppy kisses while he fumbled with her bra with the other - then he had to tear his mouth from hers to see why he was having such difficulty.

The answer was apparent at once; Shepard wasn't wearing her usual sensible sports bra - with its equally sensible easy-to-unhook clasps - but a black bra with peekaboo lace stitched in an abstract flower pattern. It was so unexpected he had to pause and stare.

"Don't tell me someone who makes hacking geth anti-aircraft gun controls look so easy is having trouble taking off a bra?" There was a laugh - but also a hint of self-consciousness - hiding in her words.

"I'm just... surprised." Kaidan let go of her hands and cupped her breasts, thumbs running over her hidden nipples; the thin material was silky and smooth against his palms, fine enough to catch on his calluses. "I've never seen you in anything like this before."

Tossing aside her shirt, she draped her arms over his shoulders, arching her back and sighing as he bent to breathe in her scent and nibble on the swell of one breast; he watched, fascinated, as a faint blush formed on her skin and crawled up to her face. "I wanted to wear something sexy for you. Do you like it?"

Raising his gaze to meet hers, he said against her skin, "Are you kidding? Just thinking about you wearing this, this whole time, makes me so..."

Unable to find a more eloquent answer, he swirled his tongue around an areola, a subtle shadow behind the lace. Her bra might've been a sexy little number, but it still tasted like cloth, though it was worth it to hear her quiet moan as he sucked the hardening nub into his mouth. Slipping his fingers underneath the silk, he pulled down the cup covering her other breast so that he could devote some attention to that nipple, too.

"I'm surprised you didn't tell me," Kaidan murmured as he suckled on the dark brown bud, savoring the scent and taste of clean woman, and felt her silent laugh puff against the top of his head. "You could've told me and watched me fidget all through dinner." 

Her fingers raked through his hair, nails digging into the back of his neck as he pulled down the other cup to pinch and roll her other nipple; he was going to have little red half-moons branded on his nape, and he didn't care if people saw them.

When she spoke, her voice wavered and sounded rougher than usual. "I was tempted, but I didn't want you to have a heart attack - at least, not before I had my wicked way with you."

His hands slid around to her back, and, after a bit of fumbling, managed to unhook her bra. Tugging it off, he said, "Well, if I'd known, I wouldn't have taken my time."

"Oh yeah?" There was a hint of challenge in her words.

"Yeah." Kaidan straightened up to kiss her twitching lips as he ran his hands up her bare back, feeling the hard, solid muscle shifting underneath her soft, smooth skin. "I would've dragged you to the nearest empty room - or maybe the Spectre office." _Or bent you over the cafe table._

He felt her mouth curve in a smirk under his. "I had no idea you were an exhibitionist, Kaidan - that office is under constant surveillance."

Fingers trailing down her warm skin to play at the waistline of her trousers, he retorted, "I can hack geth anti-aircraft guns - I'm pretty sure I can hack the cameras."

There was a certain smug quality in her tone that both irritated and aroused him. "If you could even think straight - and I'd make sure you couldn't."

"We'll see about that."

With those words, he swooped down and bit hard on her nipple, sucking on it and scraping it with his teeth with none of the gentleness he'd displayed earlier. Shepard cried out his name as he switched to devour her other breast with the same savage voraciousness, leaving a trail of bites in his wake, and while she was distracted, he scooped her up into his arms; a tall, muscular marine in top condition, she was heavy, but he didn't have far to go - and if it meant always holding her close, he'd carry her anywhere.

With his hands full, he cheated a little, using his biotics to pull the two items he'd brought to her cabin and hidden behind the hamster cage, then leapt down the shallow steps. He tossed her onto the bed hard enough for her sweet breasts to bounce in a mighty distracting way, and pounced on top of her, his mouth stealing the surprised exclamation from her lips as he let the packages fall where they may.

Being who she was, Shepard wasn't about to lay there passively, letting him ravish her without reprisal, and she retaliated in kind. Tearing her mouth away from his, she clamped her teeth on his neck, biting down and sucking hard enough to leave marks that would surely last until the next day, while her fingernails raked ten stinging trails down his back. Her strong legs, still in her trousers, wrapped around his waist, and he groaned into her hair as the fabric rubbed against his groin.

They wrestled for a few moments, both of them trying to get the upper hand; she used her enhanced strength to flip him over onto his back and pin his arms down on the bed, her mouth everywhere she could reach without releasing him. Sharp teeth nipped at his ears, his jaw, his neck, only to soothe the little pains away with her tongue afterwards. Her breasts brushed, then flattened against his chest, hard nipples stabbing into his skin, the sensation driving him mad enough to make him resort to biotics to get out of her hold.

The eezo nodules in his system flared, creating a dark energy field that enveloped her body, pulling her off him and leaving her floating in the air; Shepard's eyes widened in outrage right before they narrowed and glowed blue, her grip on his arms tightening as her own biotics manifested and clashed with his. 'Clashed' was too strong a word, it turned out; her power was subtle and gentle, weaving through his barrier, twisting gravity just enough to counter the effect so that she could straddle him again, clamping her thighs against his.

The concentration she needed to counteract his biotics loosened her grip on his arms, though, allowing him to insinuate his hand down into her trousers. It was a tight fit, since her belt was still fastened and his hand wasn't exactly small, but enough for a small static spark to jump from his fingers on the damp cloth of her panties. The tiny shock surprised her long enough for him to break her hold and reverse their positions, and this time he had her arms pinned above her head.

His victory would be short-lived, to judge by the fierce, defiant light in her eyes, but his free hand was already caressing her ribs on its way down, pausing only to tweak and pinch her nipples before he worked on undoing her belt. It wasn't easy, doing it one-handed, with her struggling and undulating beneath him while her biotics ran tingling tendrils over his bare skin, but he managed to get the clasp open at last, then the simpler fastener on her trousers, and then his fingers were finally inside the open fly. She writhed with renewed energy as he stroked her hot flesh through the thin, damp silk; by the feel of it, it was part of a matching set with her long-discarded bra, and he felt a sudden impulse to use his power to tear her trousers open to see before he squashed it. Still, they were better off than on - but he needed both hands for that.

Leaning down until his lips were at her ear, Kaidan whispered, "Do you trust me?"

It wasn't until the words were out of his mouth that he realized how important the question was; she seemed to sense it, too, and stopped struggling, though her hips still moved against his hand.

"Yes." The word ended in a hiss when he bit down on her earlobe, but there was no hesitation in her voice, no doubt in her eyes.

He withdrew his hand from her panties, smiled at the small noise of protest she made in the back of her throat, pulled her belt out of her belt loops and wrapped it around her wrists, cinching it tight. God, she looked beautiful, her slim, muscular form stretched out half naked beneath him, black hair a sharp contrast to the white pillow on which it was spread out in a small halo.

The belt was made of faux leather and tougher than the real thing, but he had no illusions that it could hold her for even half a second if she was determined to get out, without even needing to resort to biotics - but she was making no move to free herself. The sight of all that strength and power, restrained and leashed by his hand, obedient to his every whim, was an incredible turn-on; he shivered a little at the thought - and so did his cock.

It took an effort to tear his attention away from the alluring sight, but Shepard still had her trousers on, and that had to be rectified. She shivered as he ran his hands down from where he still had them clasped around her wrists, and a sigh escaped her as his fingers caressed her breasts and sides before he got up to divest her of the rest of her clothes. Her shoes - thank God he didn't have to contend with combat boots, he didn't think he had the patience - dropped to the floor with two unceremonious thumps, then her socks followed as they were flung over his shoulder, and then, finally, he got his hands on her trousers.

Her panties did indeed match her bra, Kaidan discovered when he pulled her trousers off; for all her aloofness and control, a faint stain on the front betrayed her excitement. Shepard was still holding back, but he wasn't going to have any of that. He folded a pant leg instead of tossing the trousers aside like the rest, then wrapped it around her head as a makeshift blindfold; she couldn't anticipate, couldn't prepare herself, if she couldn't see. It looked awkward and bulky, and he made a mental note to find something more comfortable and classy on the Citadel. Black silk, maybe? Or leather?

"Kaidan?" She hadn't resisted, but he could hear the uncertainty in her voice even if he couldn't see it in her eyes. The biotic field she still maintained wavered, as if in sympathy.

"Shh," he murmured as he settled himself between her legs, drawn by the intriguing scent emanating from her sex.

Her panties had the same peekaboo lace and abstract floral design as her bra, giving him a tantalizing glimpse of what they hid. Shepard squirmed as he caressed her through the sheer fabric, her swollen lips parting on a silent sigh, then her whole body jerked as he generated static shocks at the ends of his fingers, and she broke her self-imposed silence with an incoherent screech.

He doubted she would've done that if he hadn't blindfolded her; after a year of constant surveillance, first by Cerberus, then by the Alliance, she had used silence as a defense - not that she'd ever been all that demonstrative in the first place. It was a fortification he fully intended to shatter and demolish to pieces tonight.

Giving in to impatience, Kaidan rolled her panties down, and took a moment to bury his nose in the silk and breathe in the musky scent of her arousal before tossing it aside. The only thing she wore now were her dog tags.

Blind though she was, Shepard either consciously or accidentally arranged herself in a provocative pose; her breasts were lifted up and out with her hands pulled up above her head, her dog tags only serving to accentuate their curves, and her legs splayed wide, revealing all of herself to him. Sweaty skin darkened by a blush, she looked so sexy and hot, but vulnerable, too - she must really trust him if she was willing to put herself in such a compromising position. After all, she was Commander Shepard, and she didn't take shit from _anybody_ \- but she was just a woman tonight; a beautiful, desirable, willing woman, who wanted to be with _him_. Humbling thought.

"You're so beautiful," he whispered as he pressed a kiss to her raised knee, and felt her tremble. "I wish you could see yourself - you're so wet, you're dripping."

Kaidan drew little circles around her clit with fingers that crackled with sparks; her body bent into a rigid bow while choked moans fell from her lips, and ran his free hand up and down her strong, smooth leg. Tension sang in the taut muscle as she writhed against his hand; using only one digit, he delved through her silky wet folds - so soft! - while keeping his thumb on her clit, and allowed the static to subside. He had no intention of letting her adapt to the stimulation.

God, she was so hot inside, he was surprised his finger wasn't burned to a crisp, and just the thought of thrusting home into that heat was making him hard again. And she was so tight; if not for the wetness, he doubted he could fit even that much. Her inner walls rippled, clamping down on his digit as if she never wanted to let him go.

"You're so tight, Shepard, tight as a virgin," he murmured against her knee as he slid his finger out, despite her attempts to draw it back in. "It's like no one's touched you since" _you died_ "you came back."

"There hasn't been anyone else." Her breathless voice was hoarse but firm, her covered eyes facing with unerring aim towards him. "You're the only one."

"That's right - I'm the only one who'll ever get to touch you like this," Kaidan growled, to cover a surge of emotions that made him want to hug her and kiss her and fuck her, all at once, and pushed in his finger again, this time past the second knuckle. "The only cock that will ever fill all your empty places - is mine."

"Yes. Yes!" Shepard cried as he gave her another finger, grinding herself against his hand.

" _My_ cock in your mouth," Kaidan said, his voice deepening, pulling his fingers out only to thrust them back in. " _My_ cock in your cunt. _My_ cock in your ass."

Her head thrashed on the pillow, strands of black hair whipping across her flushed face as he pushed in yet another finger. "Only you," she gasped as he sped up the pace, the simple words spoken with such need, they didn't sound trite at all. 

"Come for me," he commanded, burying his fingers as deep as they could go, curving against that special spot he remembered, and unleashed powerful static shocks inside - and out, where his thumb rubbed her clit.

Shepard flared blue for a heartbeat, then stiffened, threw her head back, and screamed his name as the orgasm ambushed her, just like in his fantasies - except his pallid imaginings paled next to the reality. In his imagination, she didn't squeeze his fingers like a hot vise as he pumped them into her, striving to match the rhythm of the rippling inside, her warm come bathing them and trickling down into his palm, and her strong legs weren't clamped around his waist, muscles flexing hard enough to nearly stop his breath. 

He'd forgotten about the biotic field still suspended over them, too; invisible currents rippled through the dark energy, sensed, not seen, but strong enough to rattle loose items strewn on the bedside tables. What could be seen of her face and mouth were slack from the pleasure, and he hadn't imagined that either, nor the sweat trickling down her temples, and certainly not how absolutely _delicious_ she smelled. It was obvious he needed to upgrade his imagination to a newer model.

He didn't take his fingers out until she stopped shaking and relaxed into a boneless sprawl, though her inner walls quivered, as if in protest at the absence. Since she couldn't see, he made sure he made loud smacking noises as he sucked her come off his hand, and saw her mouth twitch. Jesus, she tasted so good, he could happily spend the rest of the evening with his face buried between her legs. It was such a good idea he acted on it, right then and there.

All the years that had separated them vanished, and Kaidan forgot the grief, the anguish, the pain and the loneliness as he lost himself in the scent and taste and feel of her, as if for the first time. The triangular patch of her pubic hair, trimmed and neat, tickled his nose as he thrust his tongue into her as far as it could go, determined to lick up every last bit of her come. Her thighs came up to frame his head, and he could feel the muscles shifting beneath the skin as he suckled on her clit.

It amazed him all over again, how soft she felt, especially when compared to how hard and solid the rest of her was. While his tongue traced along a wet, yielding ridge, his fingers trailed down to the tight ring of puckered muscle below, and he felt her twitch as they circled around. Her musky scent was stronger there, and he inhaled it deep into his lungs.

"I'll never forget that morning after the first night we'd spent together," he said into her hot, wet flesh, while his fingers danced around that other entrance. "Do you remember how you woke me up?"

Her swollen lips curved into a knowing smirk, even as her body jerked against his hand and mouth, but her voice wasn't as steady as she pretended to be. "I gave you the best damned fingerfucking and blowjob of your life."

His cock, already at half-mast from indulging himself at the feast of Shepard's lovely body, grew hard and heavy at both the memory and the sound of her husky voice. He loved it when she talked dirty. "Hell yeah - but then you were always good at using your mouth."

Shepard shuddered, unable to choke back a whine as he slid his fingers back into her while his tongue meandered down to that taut, dry entrance. Wrapped around his torso, he felt her leg muscles spasm, a reaction reflected in her wavering voice. "W-why bring that up now?"

Kaidan took a long, leisurely swipe back up to her clit, swirling his tongue around it. "I've always wanted to return the favor. In my own way."

While his tongue returned to that fascinating ridge of hard muscle, he gazed up the length of her body, drinking in the sight of her shiny dog tags bobbing up and down her heaving breasts, the glow of her sweaty skin under the lights, and knew that, under the blindfold, her pupils were dilated with lust. She didn't taste quite the same here, he thought as his tongue tunneled deeper into that rough passage, and decided he needed another sample - or ten - before he could determine if he liked it.

He was so lost in the taste of her - he'd come to the conclusion that he liked it a lot - that he almost missed the telltale trembling inside, where her inner walls - still as scalding hot and tight as ever - clenched hard on his thrusting fingers.

"Kaidan," Shepard breathed; if he hadn't been hard already, he would've sprang to attention at the sound of that raspy note of need in her voice, the one she saved for him alone, that no one else ever heard.

"Come for me, Shepard," he crooned into her skin, his tone gentle this time, not demanding, and sped up the pace of his thrusting fingers, curling and scraping them against that special spot; it wasn't exactly easy to maneuver, with the way her inner walls were squeezing them.

Her first orgasm had taken the edge off what Kaidan suspected was at least a year's worth of frustration, so her second seemed almost understated in comparison - if all he saw was the surface. She stretched like a lazy cat, arms extending above her head as far as the restraints let her, and her heels pressed on the small of his back while her thighs flexed against his face. In contrast to that relaxed picture, her inner walls rippled around his hand, and clamped down so hard on his fingers he doubted he could pull them out if he wanted to - not that he wanted to.

The dark energy field ran a thousand warm fingers over his hair and back as he licked up the new flood of come wetting his hand. Damn, he didn't think he'd ever get tired of the sweet taste of her pleasure. He dragged himself and his hand away from her sopping wet sex with an effort of will, and leaned up to kiss her, letting her taste herself on his lips; she stole the whimper that escaped him when his groin rubbed against those slick, soft folds, basking in the heat that radiated from her.

"Kaidan..." Shepard said, voice hoarse, her breath hot against his cheeks. "I want you." 

The utilitarian fabric of the trouser leg wrapped around her eyes rubbed against his forehead as she pressed clumsy kisses on his face, determined lips hunting blindly for his. Her legs tightened around his waist, pulling him against her, leaving him no doubt as to _what_ she wanted. He reached down and took hold of himself, and teased the head of his cock through her wet folds and swirled it around her clit, catching up her come and mixing it with his own. She arched her back and tightened her legs around him to try to get closer, but he leaned back out of reach.

"You're not the one in control here," Kaidan said, his tone harsher than he intended as sweat popped out on his brow and rolled down his face from the effort of restraining himself, fighting the urge to snap his hips forward and bury himself inside her to the hilt. He was glad she couldn't see how much it cost him.

"Kaidan..." His name came out as a thwarted whine. "Please."

Swallowing with a suddenly dry throat, he deemed it too dangerous to continue to bait her like that without ending the game much too early. To buy some time to regain his composure - or at least his equilibrium - he unwrapped her legs from around his waist, and looked around for those packages he'd brought over. It was a real wrench to drag himself away from her warm body, but he couldn't see either of them anywhere.

Her blindfolded face turned this way and that as she tried to sense where he went. "Hey, where're you going?" she said, frustration evident in her tone.

"Shh," he whispered, reaching out to run a soothing hand along her side, as if he were calming a skittish animal; it must've worked, because she subsided. "I just need to find something."

His questing fingers finally closed around one of the packages; the damned things must've rolled underneath the bedside table. Sitting back on the edge of the bed, items in hand, he took a moment to just admire her flushed, sweaty form. _Mine, mine, all mine_ , ran the lilting song in his heart. Then he looked closer, and realized what he'd overlooked in the frenzied, lust-filled drive to get Shepard naked.

All the scars that he remembered - both big and small - were gone; he wasn't sure why he hadn't expected it, since the distinctive parallel slashes across her face had been missing since Horizon, as was the acid burn that had covered much of her left arm when he'd seen her more recently in BDUs.

He'd known many of the more visible ones had vanished, though he'd made certain to never look too closely at her when she was putting on and taking off her armor - if only so he wouldn't walk around with a constant erection for everyone to see. Not to mention that having one while the plumbing was hooked up was pretty damned uncomfortable. 

Her skin, the color of which always reminded him of coffee with milk, was flawless. Kaidan felt strange, seeing that; there hadn't been many opportunities to make love before the SR-1 had been destroyed, but he remembered running his tongue over each and every one of them, and sometimes, when she was feeling forthcoming, she told him the stories behind a few of them. Now he'd never get the chance to learn them all.

If he was disturbed by their lack, how did she feel? He shook off the unease, and ran his hands over that expanse of smooth skin, cool now as the air cyclers dried her sweat. Shepard felt the same, she smelled the same, she tasted the same, and she looked the same, even without the scars, but he still had the nagging sense she wasn't as at home in her own body as she let on - or maybe the concurrent wars with both Cerberus and the Reapers had drastically rearranged her priorities.

Well, he'd just have to do his part to make her feel more comfortable inside her own skin. Well, maybe not exactly _comfortable_.

Shepard had relaxed under his caresses, but made a startled exclamation as he turned her over, revealing the backside he'd admired so many times over the years - and discovered it wasn't just her scars that were missing.

"Your tattoo - it's gone." Kaidan settled himself between her legs again and brushed his hand over the empty spot on her left buttock, where the lurid, blood-red dragon logo of her favorite team used to be. Damn. That tattoo had been like an old friend.

"I know... I keep meaning to get a new one, but I never got the chance." She wriggled in a damned distracting way as his fingers dipped down between her buttocks and into her sex.

"You realize there's only one way to correct that right now."

Despite all her protestations that she was just a simple marine, Shepard was sharp, and realized what he intended at once. "You wouldn't - shit!" she screeched as his palm came down and administered a stinging blow to her buttock.

"I would," Kaidan said, but he wasn't sure if she heard him as he rained slaps down onto those round, firm mounds as fast as he could swing his arm - and as hard as he could, alternating between left and right.

She wriggled around so much he had to pin her down with his other hand, and he watched, fascinated, as her coffee-with-milk skin darkened and shivered with every blow. He switched hands when the pins-and-needles feeling turned into numbness, ignoring her indignant cries of _Kaidan!_ and _Bastard!_ and other less-than-kind terms, and noted that, for all her protests, she used neither her biotics nor her enhanced strength to escape. He didn't stop until both his palms were tingling and her buttocks were covered in reddened handprints.

Shepard didn't stop complaining until he pulled her back against him and rolled his erection against her wet folds; the skin of her ass was hot from the spanking, and felt wonderful against his groin. God, he was so hard, his cock was practically touching his stomach.

"Kaidan..." she said, the plea clear in her voice. As if that weren't enough, she lifted her hips up, raising her reddened backside in the air.

Jesus, just that husky voice of hers alone could undo him, nevermind offering up her ass with such trust, and he almost surrendered to both his needs and hers. Only the fact that the packages he'd been hunting for earlier were sitting right there on the bed stopped him.

With hands that shook a little, he popped open the cap on the tube of lubricant and squirted some into his palm. After his fingers were slick and slippery, he added another generous dollop, and pushed them into her puckered entrance. He heard her draw in a sharp breath as he stretched her, but made no complaint, even though she had to be drawing her own conclusions as to why he was preparing her in that place.

He picked up the other package, removed the cap, and smeared more lubricant onto it before he pushed it into her with care. Shepard's gasp was louder when she realized she'd jumped to the wrong conclusion.

"W-what's that?"

Kaidan placed a calming hand on the still-hot skin of her buttock, feeling her shift under his touch as he slid the vibrator home, until the protective cone was flush against her entrance. Then he tucked the bendable handle up until it was nestled in the valley between her buttocks, out of the way. "Just a little something I picked up on the Citadel while you were off in meetings."

Shepard squirmed, buttocks flexing around the toy, to settle it or dislodge it, he wasn't sure. "It doesn't feel that little."

He gave her something else to think about that also wasn't little as he guided himself to that other passage, one that was wet, hot, and dripping, begging to be filled. She shrieked his name as his hips snapped forward, burying himself inside her to the balls in one hard stroke.

Oh, God, she was so hot, so _tight_ , he had to think about various methods for safely overclocking omni-tool microframes before he came, and nearly lost the battle when she rippled and clenched around him. Sweat dripped from the tip of his nose to land on her back, and he concentrated on kissing the freckles that were strewn like stars across her shoulders, scattered by a careless hand, as he moved in a cautious retreat. He could feel the stiffness of the vibrator just on the other side of a thin wall, and decided not to turn it on until later, or else he'd explode right then and there.

When he was able to direct his attention back outward, he saw her head hanging low, resting on her outstretched arms. "You okay?" he asked, and hardly recognized his own voice, it sounded so hoarse.

"Yeah," she said, the word drifting out on a shuddering sigh. "I just - God, I feel so full."

Kaidan withdrew, gritting his teeth as she rippled and clamped down around him. Dammit, he was _not_ going to embarass himself a second time.

Taking a deep breath of the musky air to steady himself, he bent to kiss her nape, just under her amp port; his own dog tags dragged along her back as he reached under to cup her breast, his other moving down to her clit. Though her skin was cool as the cyclers dried her sweat, he could sense the warmth lurking just beneath, heating his chest and stomach, strengthening to what felt like a conflagration where they were joined. It didn't matter where he touched her, it only reminded him that he was at her complete mercy; for all that he'd tied her up, that he was in charge for once, she was the one who could shatter his self-control with a mere word, or an injudicious movement.

The way Shepard was clenching on him as he withdrew was sheer torture, her inner walls pulled on him with such force, but he was able to slide out until only the head of his cock remained inside her. Abandoning her clit to take hold of both her firm breasts, which he'd been ignoring for far too long, he pulled and pinched her nipples as he took his time thrusting back in.

"Kaidan..." she said as she arched her back to meet him, an unspoken plea for him to speed up the pace in her voice - not knowing he couldn't, for fear of losing control.

For her, he would try, dare anything - and he had: he'd ridden with her in the Mako as she drove the tank through a gauntlet of geth armatures and into the Conduit on Ilos, he'd stood at her side when they'd taken on Saren, when the rogue turian Spectre had turned into some kind of Reaper avatar, and he'd shot a Councilor on nothing but her word. Of all the crazy, risky things he'd done in his life - most of them while under her command - surely loving her was one of the most insane.

He confined himself to short, shallow strokes, not trusting himself yet with anything more vigorous in case he hurt her - though she wasn't making it easy for him. He doubted he could do any real damage to someone who took out Reapers on foot even at his worst, but why take the chance?

Wrapping his hand around the handle of the vibrator, he thrust in and pulled the toy out, and when he withdrew, he pushed it back in. His thumb hovered on the button that would turn the toy on, but did he have enough finesse to...? 

Kaidan smiled. Shepard always did say he thought too much. There was only one way to find out.

She screamed and bucked as he pushed the vibrator all the way in and turned it on for a brief second, then pulled it out as he tunneled into her other entrance, surprising her by changing his rhythm to long, slow thrusts, bumping up against her womb on every upstroke. He moaned into her back as she welcomed him in without reservation, his hand shaking on the handle of the toy, the other clutching hard on her breast. He was wrong - he wasn't in charge at all, and that fact was obvious, so obvious, in the way his hips moved of their own accord while his head swam, dizzy from the pleasure.

Rough fingers eased their hold on her breast, teased and pinched at the already hard pebble her nipple had become, then dipped into the valley and back up the slope again to check the other, firm, rounded flesh slapping into his palm as his thrusts rocked her body back and forth. An incoherent litany composed mostly of his name spilled from her mouth as his hand mapped the ridges of her flat stomach, encountered damp, wiry hair, then found her clit rearing proudly up and out of its protective hood.

Shepard nearly threw him off when his fingers painted that sensitive bundle of nerves with static shocks, but he held on to her somehow, even if he was just barely hanging on to his sanity with his fingernails when he felt her inner walls squeezing him so hard in a very familiar pattern. God, he hadn't felt that in much too long, that and the feelings of fierce joy and satisfaction and not a little possessiveness, knowing _he_ was the one who'd brought her such pleasure. His thumb spasmed on the vibrator's switch, then he felt her go rigid, her warm come bathing his aching flesh as he rolled and flexed his hips, sinking deeper into her than ever before.

Loud wet sounds accompanied their groans and grunts and cries as his heavy balls slapped against her, his thrusts growing more and more reckless and erratic.

"Jesus... y-you feel so good, Shepard. So good," Kaidan growled as he pulled out, fighting the whole way against her grasping inner walls, then filled her again with a hard, bone-jarring thrust; she was so slick by now he practically glided to the entrance of her womb.

"Kaidan," Shepard said in a voice thick with lust, arching her back and sucking him in with all the strength of one of her singularities. "Come for me."

Dammit - he never could bring himself to disobey her orders, especially when it was made in a smoky voice that was two-parts need and one part command. Unable to control himself, his spasming hand switched the vibrator on while he was still deep inside her, and felt the buzzing of the toy migrating like lightning into his groin. Dammit! Every knot of tension unwound, all at once, taking the frayed and tattered remnants of his control with them as that inner dam broke.

Someone was screaming incoherent curses, almost sobbing, and a part of him was shocked to realize that it was _him_ making all those animal-like noises. Then his vision burned with white and blue fire, blinding him to everything except her hot inner walls contracting like a vise on him, milking him for everything he had.

When he came to his senses, Kaidan found himself collapsed onto Shepard's warm, sweaty back, and frowned when the light seemed to be brighter than usual, coming from an odd angle. Then he felt his face warm - well, more than it already was - when he saw her lamp had fallen onto the floor; his biotics must've flared, knocking it and everything else off the tables. It was a good thing nothing had broken, he thought, as he used his powers to put everything back in place, or she'd never let him hear the end of it. As it was, he hoped she'd been too out of it to notice.

Underneath him, she stretched, making a contented, growly little noise in the back of her throat that had his softening cock twitching inside her. He pressed lazy kisses to the winged curves of her clavicles, to the back of her neck, the hard edges of her amp port cool against his lips, and all the dark brown freckles he could reach without moving too much. Shepard made for a wonderful bed, with her soft skin disguising her solid muscles, her ass cradling his groin, every curve complementing the flatter planes of his body. They fit together so well.

Summoning the energy from somewhere, he levered himself up, and tried to ignore her sleepy complaint as he withdrew from her. He hissed; the cool air of her cabin felt _frigid_ after being nestled inside her hot flesh. A warm tide of their mingled come washed over his groin and thighs; he slid his hand between her legs to catch some of it up, and licked it off his fingers. It was hardly a surprise to find that it tasted really damn good.

Kaidan rolled her over onto her back and curled himself around her warm, sweaty body. Reaching down, he caught up some more of their mingled essence, and pressed his slick hand against her mouth. "Taste."

Shepard's lips parted, letting him slide his fingers into her mouth. Even so soon after his orgasm, he felt his cock trying to rise to the occasion as he watched her lick and suck on his hand with as much relish as she'd shown with the ice cream earlier, feeling the suction and the motion of her tongue. God, that mouth of hers - it was _wasted_ on making deals with turians and krogan, the geth and quarians; it was made for giving blowjobs. Giving _him_ blowjobs.

"Tastes good, doesn't it?" he said, and was answered by her enthusiastic nod and hum of agreement. He took his fingers out of her mouth and replaced them with his lips, tasting the saltiness of his seed and her own musky flavor mixed with cinnamon.

He'd rested long enough to entertain something more ambitious, and kissed the marks he'd left on her neck, now showing up dark against her skin, her collarbones, then he paused to worship her breasts. Maybe they weren't that big, but they belonged on a soldier in top condition, and they fit perfectly into his palms. Her breath ruffled his hair as he flicked his tongue over a nipple, and with his head resting between her breasts, he could both hear and feel her heart begin to race.

"Kaidan -" She gasped as he bit down on her nipple, adding one more mark to the ones already decorating her breast. "Where are you getting all this energy?"

He chuckled into her chest. "Having a couple days off from sweeping out Cerberus and Reapers might have something to do with it. Besides, you... inspire me," he added, and decided not to mention the weeks of sexual frustration since he'd transferred to the SR-2, only made worse by their recent sparring sessions.

They'd spent the last week flying through hostile territory, dodging Reaper forces while making covert drops onto planets to recover people or material or both. Thanks to the _Normandy's_ stealth drive, they were in and out before the Reapers - or Cerberus - could catch them, and that meant he'd been taking it easy.

Shepard stretched underneath him, a rumbling growl deep in her chest as he switched to pay homage to her other breast. "I have been working you hard," she murmured, though whether she was referring to making love or their missions, he didn't know.

"Labor of love," Kaidan assured her, nuzzling the underside of her breast, fully aware that his stubble was scraping across the sensitive skin, and inhaled her scent; no perfume could ever compete with the smell of sweat and sex she wore.

While he suckled her, his hand wandered down her warm, sticky body until his fingers encountered the handle of the vibrator, still sticking out of her ass. He drew out the toy, hearing her breath hiss between her teeth as he did so, and fumbled for the cap. As he clapped the two pieces together, he mentally congratulated himself for buying the more expensive self-cleaning model. Once the light was green, the vibrator slid out of the socket, now shiny and sterilized.

With a slight twinge of regret, he left her breasts and raised himself to kiss her, giving her swollen bottom lip a light nip. "You good?" he murmured, knowing she would understand all the different meanings layered in the question.

Shepard's chin lifted, mouth stretching in a cocky smile. "I'm good. Bring it on, Kaidan."

That was his commander: fearless and brave. He arranged himself so that he was kneeling on a pillow, pulled her arms down so that her bound wrists were resting on her stomach, then turned around as he straddled her head.

"It's time you put that silver tongue of yours to good use, Shepard," Kaidan said as he lowered himself down onto her face, and braced himself on all fours.

"Aye aye, sir," she said in a cheeky tone, then he felt her eager mouth on his ass.

With the blindfold still on and her hands tied, all she had to guide her was her tongue, but she didn't let that stop her. His eyelids drooped as she worked, feeling her hot mouth exploring him, then his eyes grew wide when he felt her biotic field flare around him; it had dissipated some time earlier, but now he shivered as it sank through and intersected with his barrier.

"That's cheating," he said, swallowing as tendrils of dark energy stretched him wider, allowing her tongue to push further into him instead of just teasing around that tight ring of muscle.

"Improvising," Shepard demurred, and he felt her smile when he shivered from her breath blowing on damp, sensitive skin.

The biotic field was as intangible as smoke, but Kaidan could feel it lifting, then cupping his balls, squeezing them in a gentle grip as she licked his perineum. He squirmed, grinding against her face as her tongue lingered there; she knew how much he liked that spot to be touched, to be stimulated. Warm fingers of dark energy insinuated themselves deep inside him with sensual slowness; with a quiet groan, he made himself relax as much as he could, and let her invade him. The faint heat and pressure felt exquisite, giving him the best and most thorough prostate massage he'd ever experienced; every touch felt like it was arcing straight through his groin and into his cock.

He knew he should feel worried, frightened even, about all that power concentrated around his privates, but he didn't - in fact, it excited him, more than a little. He was putting his life in her hands - though that was nothing new.

Then what felt like a bolt of lightning got shoved up his ass, shattering his complacency.

"Yeow!" It was a miracle he hadn't smashed head-first into the shuttered window on the ceiling, he'd jumped so high.

When he came back down, he lifted himself off her, and turned to see that Shepard, cruel woman that she was, was grinning at him. She stuck her tongue out and made a spark dance on the moist tip, leaving no question as to what had happened.

"Consider that payback for spanking me," Shepard said, and licked her lips, looking like the cat who'd eaten a canary the size of the _Normandy_.

It'd felt kind of... good, actually, now that he was over the shock and surprise. Really good. So good he wanted her to do it again, and he said so.

Her grin transmuted into a self-satisfied smirk. "It's always the quiet ones, isn't it?" Her smirk broadened. "At least until I make you scream."

With a growl, Kaidan straddled her head again, only this time he was facing her, with his groin pressed to her face. "Shut up and suck me."

A fat spark leapt from the tip of her tongue to the crown of his cock, followed immediately by a warm, wet lick, and he shuddered. His hand fisted in her short hair, hard enough for a wince to pass across what could be seen of her features, moving her head as she suckled him. Then he gasped as she swallowed him whole into her hot, hungry mouth; he looked down and saw her nose buried in his pubic hair, lips stretched wide around him. Shepard never did do anything by halves.

Watching her mouth on him was almost as good as feeling it, as her tongue fluttered against the slit, then swirled around the knob, her hum of contentment vibrating into him. He jerked and twitched as static played up and down and inside his cock, but the pain only made the dark pleasure all the sweeter. 

Her biotic field folded him into its embrace again, but this time the subtle currents of power washed over his whole body instead of concentrating around his privates. As she licked him from tip to base and back again, dark energy ran loving fingers down his back and squeezed his ass, teased his nipples and twined around his legs. He wasn't getting just a blowjob, but a full-body job.

Thanks to her biotics, talented tongue, and the obvious pleasure she was getting out of it, he was hard again. As much as he wanted to fuck her mouth and watch her swallow his seed, there was something else he had to do - he had a promise to keep, after all. So he pulled - wrenched - himself away, though not without a pang of regret. There would be other opportunities, he told himself.

She sighed. "You taste so good."

Kaidan swung his leg over, then wriggled and squirmed until he was lounging next to her. "Hmm, let me have a taste..." he murmured against her lips, and kissed her.

When he'd kissed his fill of the salty, spicy flavor of himself on her tongue, she murmured, "Kaidan?"

"Yeah?"

Shepard's face turned towards him, and he had the uncanny impression she could see him right through the blindfold. "I want... I want to see you. I want to see you come."

That seemed like a reasonable request - and a flattering one, too. He reached out to tug off the trouser leg, and got up on his knees. Shepard blinked, gray eyes adjusting to the light after the long period of darkness, and he smiled as her gaze was drawn to his groin. He grasped himself, hand moving in a long, slow stroke as he displayed his hard cock, shiny with her saliva, for her perusal. _Yes, this is what you do to me._ Her stare had an almost palpable weight, and for a moment he thought he felt her caressing him, even though her hands were still tied.

That feeling didn't go away as she watched him pick up the tube of lubricant and apply the gel to his hands; she parted her legs and let him prepare her. She was still loose from the vibrator, but he added more lubricant anyway, taking care to stretch her with gentle, slick fingers, even though the scent emanating from her sex was driving him crazy. Then he reached for the vibrator, and slid it home between those wet folds; she twitched when he couldn't resist toying with her clit. 

With her hot, avid eyes on him, he made a show of lubricating himself, cupping his balls with one hand and stroking himself with the other, smearing the clear gel all over his cock until it glowed under the lights. Without his prompting, Shepard stretched her arms back above her head while he positioned himself between her legs, the blunt head looking huge compared to that puckered entrance. He glanced up, looked straight into her eyes, and saw her silent assent in them. They didn't speak - they didn't have to.

Putting her legs on his shoulders, Kaidan guided himself forward, careful this time to let her adjust to him. But, God, it was hard when she felt so snug, so tight, despite all his preparations, and she didn't feel any less hot there. With the blindfold off, he could see the effects on her face now, as well; her pupils were dilated, lips parted as she gasped for air, her face was flushed, and as he thrust into her in tiny increments, beads of sweat popped out on her forehead and rolled down her temples - but she never stopped looking him in the eye. What a beautiful sight she made.

"Can you see it, Shepard?" he said through gritted teeth as she clenched tight around him. "See how deep I am inside you?"

Shepard's bound hands were clenched, her neck taut and corded, her whole body singing with the tension that was reflected within. "No, but I can feel it. Oh, God, can I feel it."

"Can you feel this, too?" It was awkward, but he managed to reach around her leg and flick on the vibrator for a brief moment, and at the same time he withdrew and thrust forward.

Judging from the way she nearly leapt right off the bed and shrieked, she did. Kaidan groaned as she squeezed him; the muscles were a lot stronger there, and even though it had little of the subtlety and delicacy of the other, there was a kind of primal power there, and it felt damned good. Really damned good. 

Her biotic field flared, currents of dark energy waking from quiescence, spreading wide open to fold him in, intersecting, sinking through and back, meshing in complex waves with his own barrier. The pulses of her power matched the same rhythm as his strokes, making it hard for him to keep control.

His fingers gripped her hips hard enough to bruise as he seated himself inside her, so deep his balls were pressed right up against her buttocks, and took a moment to regain his equilibrium, catch his breath, and savor how tight she felt.

Shepard had slumped against the pillow, breathing hard; she looked exhausted, but not from reading reports about things she couldn't change or fighting a battle that was looking more precarious by the day, but from their lovemaking. It was the good kind of weariness, and it was something she should wear more often, if he had anything to say about it - and he did, come to think of it. It didn't fool him into thinking she was really out of energy, not from the way she was straining around him.

"D-don't," Kaidan stuttered, choking as a particularly strong ripple tested the fraying edges of his control, and his hands spasmed on the hard edges of her hips as if he could somehow catch it back.

"Don't what?" Even through the sweat, her mischievous grin gleamed on her reddened face like a star.

He groaned as she clenched on him again, losing his train of thought over a mental cliff, but got some payback when he turned on the vibrator again. This tactic backfired; the buzzing toy disrupted her concentration, but being balls-deep inside her, he felt it all along his length, too, and more of his restraint was lost to the winds, shaken loose, until he managed to turn it off.

Shepard had thrown her head back, revealing the reddened perforated semi-circles of his earlier lovebites on her neck. "Don't hold back, Kaidan," she breathed.

The command in her voice bypassed his brain and hotwired itself directly to his groin, and before he knew it, he was driving into her with long, hard strokes. Filthy words and sacrilegous profanity all strung together with her name escaped his mouth as he withdrew and thrust himself into that slick, hot passage.

That tiny part of his mind not drowning in the pleasure knew he wasn't going to last long at this frenzied pace, and turned on the vibrator to its highest setting so that she wasn't left wanting. One hand held her hip to keep her bucking body still, while the other reached around her leg to fondle her clit, static gathering at her sex and between his legs. Pleasure and pain merged, just like their barriers and bodies had, until he couldn't tell them apart anymore, no longer knew where one began and one ended, amplifying every sensation until his mind must surely break under the onslaught.

The world narrowed to this moment of time - this string of moments - linked together by each harsh inhalation, each shuddering groan, each stroke, every quivering squeeze of her walls on him. They were free of everything in this tiny slice of eternity; there were no Reapers, no Cerberus, no meaningless deaths, no betrayals, and no futile battles - just them, a man and a woman, taking joy from each other and giving it back in infinite measure.

The building sensations grew so intense, they couldn't be sustained for long; Kaidan cried out as everything spiraled out of his control and unwound, all at once, and the world dissolved in wild blue fire. Through the flames, he saw Shepard's features contort as she came, for the first time in a very long time, now that the blindfold was off. God, she looked beautiful, with the biotic flare highlighting the sweat, the curve of her brows, and her parted lips. Dimly, over the roaring in his ears, he could hear her screaming, too.

He fell down on top of her in a boneless sprawl, limp hands letting her legs slide off his shoulders, though he had enough presence of mind to turn off the vibrator first - it took him a few tries. Her ragged breathing ruffled his hair and cooled the sweat trickling down his brow, then he felt her press a kiss to his forehead. It gave him the energy to lift himself off her and fall onto his side beside her; when he would've pulled away, she threw her leg over his hip to keep him joined to her.

For a small space of time, he was content to just let himself fall into her gray eyes, breathe in the scents of sex and sweat, and hold her in his arms as his cock softened inside her. His fingers trailed up her side, her arms, then he unwrapped the belt from around her wrists, and began massaging the stiffness out of her arms.

Shepard stirred, pressing languid kisses to his face once he'd settled back down beside her. "Do that again."

He chuckled, lacking the energy to laugh, and kissed her back, even as his groin tightened at the thought that she'd let him tie her up again. "Sure - just, uh, gimme some time to recover. That was... pretty intense."

Her only reply was a smirk, which he did his best to wipe away with his tongue and lips.

"I'll be right back," Kaidan promised her as he withdrew from her with a groan. 

With reluctance, he disentangled himself from her and sat up, wincing as his feet encountered the cold floor, and staggered on shaking legs to her bathroom. He took a moment for a quick wash, and came back out with a wet towel.

The music that had been playing all through their lovemaking was off; he hadn't even noticed, until its sudden lack was made conspicuous by the silence, but forgot all about it when his attention was riveted to the naked woman in the bed. Shepard had taken out the vibrator, and was looking at him with heavy-lidded eyes as she licked the come off it in a way that made him groan deep in his throat. Joining her in bed, he reveled in the warmth of her body and the sheets as he took away the vibrator and kissed her, tasting both himself and her on her lips.

Lost in exploring her mouth, it took a while for him to remember what he was doing with a wet towel in his hand, and dragged himself away from her lips. Pulling himself to a sitting position, he cleaned her with the cloth, and she gave him a lazy smile as she submitted to his ministrations. Then her hand came up, touching his chest as he set the towel aside and pulled the blankets up over them.

"You still have this?" Her brows raised in surprise, Shepard touched the charm resting on the chain, next to his dog tags.

"Yeah." Kaidan covered her hand with his, and wondered if she was thinking about the night she had given it to him. They'd made the drop onto Ilos the next day. "Made it through every mission they assigned me, these past three years, thanks to my good luck charm. That's what I think, anyway."

The only time he'd ever taken it off was when he'd started dating that doctor - but it would be impolitic to mention that now. He'd put it back on after seeing Shepard on Horizon - he'd always had the superstitious suspicion that not wearing it had probably been why that mission had gone so pear-shaped.

Unaware of the turn of his thoughts, she said, "I wouldn't have thought they'd let you -"

"Yeah, the shrinks told me I had to put it away after you - after the SR-1 - the Collectors - after what happened." A hint of bitterness seeped into his tone. "I think they were keeping an especially close eye on me, since I was an L2 and all. Afraid I might snap like so many other L2s and go on a rampage, I guess."

If it hadn't been for the knowledge of the Reapers' imminent invasion... he might well have taken refuge in madness from all the pain. Then again, maybe he wouldn't, not with his parents, and not with the knowledge that Shepard would surely storm in from the afterlife and kick his ass seven ways from Sunday.

"Kaidan..." She reached up to caress his face.

There was so much sympathy in her voice, Kaidan curled around her and buried his face in the crook of her neck, hugging her tight. Shepard was alive, she was here and in his arms, he told himself; the smell and taste and feel of her only reinforced the reality. And of course she would understand - she'd been slapped with biotic dampeners after she'd turned herself in.

Her biotic field had dispersed earlier, but now it manifested again and folded him in, rippling around him in a protective shell. She leaned back, catching his hand and twining her fingers with his; the gesture seemed more _intimate_ , somehow, than all their desperate kisses and passionate lovemaking.

"Do you want it back?" he asked, and realized he'd placed his free hand over the charm. He forced himself to let go. "I know you only gave it to me to make me feel better -"

"It was a gift," she said, interrupting him. Taking his hand, she put it back over his dog tags and squeezed it. "It was the only thing of real value that I owned, and I wanted you to have it. I haven't changed my mind."

He smiled at her, relieved, and kissed her. "Well, okay. Thanks. It really does mean a lot to me."

Shepard pressed her forehead against his. "Kaidan?"

"Yeah?"

"Would you... come back tomorrow?" she said, sounding more uncertain than he'd ever heard her.

Kaidan's smile broadened, even as his heart swelled with both happiness - and love. "I'd like to. If you'll have me." Her only reply was a sweet smile that he just couldn't resist kissing.

"I love you," she whispered against his lips, her hand tightening on his.

He memorized the joy on her face, the smile softening the lines on her forehead and around her eyes, and tucked it away in a corner of his heart. After swallowing down a lump in his throat, he said, "I love you so much."

If only there were a way to preserve this moment forever, he thought as he held her close, one hand tangled in hers, the other caressing the cool skin of her bare back. Unfortunately, something much more mundane intruded itself: his stomach growled, and a second later, so did hers.

"Oh, for cryin' out loud," he muttered as he buried his face into the crook of her neck, and felt her silent laughter vibrating into him.

Shepard pressed a kiss against the top of his head and turned to rummage in a drawer, pulling out two energy bars; after a glance at the labels, she handed one to him. "Unless you want to wake up with a headache tomorrow, you'll eat this."

His lips twitched; it was just like her to take care of him, like he was just another soldier she'd look after. "You keep energy bars up here?"

She shrugged, causing the blanket to slide down one shoulder. "Well, sometimes I want a snack and I don't feel like trekking all the way down to the crew deck."

His smile turned into a grin on seeing his bar was pineapple flavored; it was the only kind the Alliance issued that didn't taste like crap. "You remembered."

"I always knew you were the one who'd emptied the dispenser, leaving just the cherry-flavored ones - which I hate." She mock scowled at him as she unwrapped her bar. "You never bothered to restock, either, you lazy pig. You could've at least put in an order for more."

He laughed, embarrassed, as he tore open his bar. "Sorry. And here I thought I'd gotten away with it. Too used to trying to hide my appetite, I guess - there weren't any other biotics at my previous posts before I got a berth on the _Normandy_ , and I didn't want to be treated differently. The headaches made me stand out too much as it was."

Shepard gave him a sympathetic smile. "You get economy-sized meals, just like I do, but you don't seem that self-conscious about it anymore."

Kaidan shrugged, biting into the moist, chewy bar. After he swallowed, he replied, "Well, seeing Sovereign and chasing Saren all over the galaxy put things in perspective. There were bigger things to worry about, like rachni, geth, and Reapers."

They finished their energy bars and tossed the wrappers into the receptacle near one of the tables with their biotics. Then Shepard settled back against him, throwing one possessive arm over his waist like she never planned to leave the bed again - which would be just fine with him.

"Not going to take a shower?"

Her silent laugh feathered his cheeks. "I don't think I can move, much less get out of bed. Besides, I like the feel of your come inside me," she added, her rough voice even smokier than usual.

He growled, pulling her closer against him. "Keep talking like that and we're not going to get any sleep tonight."

Shepard kissed him, and smiled against his lips as she raised one hand to wave the lights off. "Then I guess I shouldn't say anything more - except 'good night'."

"Good night," Kaidan said, and pressed a kiss on her forehead.

His last thought before he fell asleep was that skipping the usual rituals of hygiene for just one night wouldn't kill either of them.


	5. Chapter 5

The first thing Kaidan noticed when he woke was that he hadn't banged his arms or feet against anything when he stretched, and his eyes popped open to see that he wasn't in his usual cramped, coffin-like bunk bed in the crew quarters. The faint smell of sex on the sheets and the pleasant ache in his muscles reminded him that he was in Shepard's bed, in Shepard's cabin, after a night of mind-melting lovemaking. The commander was nowhere in sight. Then he noticed a bundle on the blanket next to him.

A data pad rested on a neatly folded set of BDUs, along with a pair of socks. He wondered how she'd gotten his clothes, and his face warmed as he imagined her ordering one of the crew to get them out of his footlocker, calm as you please. Or had she gone rummaging herself? Either way, tongues had to be wagging if she'd been caught. He snorted at his own hypocrisy as he reached out to pick up the data pad; he hadn't felt this worried the previous night, when anyone and everyone could've seen them on the Presidium.

The pad only had a couple of lines, which was just as well, considering how groggy he felt. _Sparring called on account of_ \- here he stopped and grinned, because _hot, sexy, naked man in my bed_ had been crossed out; since she could've just deleted it, she'd meant for him to see that. He continued to read: _on account of making breakfast. Come down when ready._

Looking at the clock on the bedside table, he could see why it'd been canceled; he hadn't overslept like this in a long time. After reading the pad a third time, he grew more alert; Shepard didn't usually have time to cook, but when she did, the results were usually spectacular - and _delicious_.

A standard-issue toothbrush had been laid out for him, too, as well as his shaving kit, which Shepard must've included in her spoils after getting fresh clothes for him. Well, he'd been told he looked particularly disreputable, piratical even, before he shaved, but the gesture still touched him.

After luxuriating in a shower he didn't have to share with anyone else, Kaidan dressed and began to shave. As always when he navigated the razor with care around his nose and lips, a zen-like trance state descended on him, during which time he pondered deep philosophical questions like why science, which had given them things like mass relays, spaceships, and FTL communications, hadn't improved upon the humble razor. Even the ancient toothbrush had been upgraded with tiny mass effect generators. Maybe it was because only human men grew hair on their faces - a pretty small market share compared to the hygienic needs of the rest of the galaxy's races.

He snapped out of it when he was done, and it wasn't until he was putting on the aftershave that he noticed the hickeys peeking out of his collar. Despite his best efforts to adjust his shirt, the red marks remained quite visible. Unless he wanted to hide in his mancave - er, starboard observation - until they faded, everyone would see them, but the thought didn't seem as daunting anymore. In fact, he couldn't really bring himself to care.

Kaidan gathered his dirty clothes into a bundle and headed to the elevator. On the crew deck, he heard quiet conversation in the mess when he stepped out, and his stomach growled like a rabid varren as the delectable smell of cooking food wafted towards him on a breeze from the air cyclers. After dropping off his laundry in the crew quarters, he heard Tali's lilting voice.

"Is Shepard... is she _humming_?" the quarian asked with quiet astonishment. 

Kaidan rounded the corner in time to hear Garrus say, "She certainly is." The turian spotted him and waved. "Morning, Kaidan."

"Morning, everyone," Kaidan said as he sauntered by the two dextros, exchanging a nod with Tali, and to Traynor, who was sitting next the quarian.

Shepard had taken her formal jacket off to cook; the collar of her black shirt didn't quite hide the hickeys he'd given her last night. Well, neither did his BDUs, so they were even.

"Wow, something smells good." He leaned over the pan, taking a deep, appreciative sniff of the contents while he reached over and brushed his hand over Shepard's ass, going for a surreptitious squeeze of the firm flesh.

He glanced over and saw a blush on her face, one that couldn't be attributed entirely to the heat of the stove, and her eyes smoldered with lust and memories of the previous night before a sweep of her eyelashes hid it away. It didn't stop her long spoon rapping his knuckles as quick as a snake when he tried to steal a bit of the eggs, though.

"Ow!" He hugged his hand to his chest and gave her a reproachful look, rubbing his smarting knuckles.

"You know better than to do that, Kaidan," the commander said without sympathy, cinnamon stick meandering to the other side of her mouth as she returned the spoon to the pan to stir through the simmering eggs and potatoes. Sweeping it back up like a baton, she used it to point at the mess tables. "It'll be ready when it's ready, so go sit and wait like a good little soldier."

"Yes, ma'am," he said, meek as a scolded boy, but his eyes were hot as he took in her flushed face, so like how she'd looked in bed just hours before. He grabbed a cup of coffee as a feint and pinched her ass, making a narrow escape before she could swat him.

"She's an unholy terror with that spoon, isn't she?" Traynor said, giving Kaidan a sympathetic look.

Kaidan sat down on Tali's other side. "Makes you wonder what she could do to the Reapers with a ladle."

The comm specialist grinned. "I shudder to think."

It was a real pleasure to watch Shepard; she cooked like she fought, with an economy of motion and no wasted energy. She looked like she was flipping pancakes - but they smelled more like bread. Though Kaidan did detect just a hint of flamboyance in the way she flipped a white, round and flat piece of dough in the air exactly twice before she caught it in the pan. Those weren't pancakes stacked in a neat column, he realized now - the color was all wrong. 

"I didn't even know we had tortillas," he remarked.

Traynor propped her chin in her hands, a sigh escaping her; the wistful look on her face reminded Kaidan of Liara, for some reason. "We don't - she made them from scratch."

Tali stared at the commander. "You know, I haven't heard her hum in... in a long time."

Garrus seemed just as fascinated by all the activity, as if he couldn't reconcile the image of the commander as a biotic warrior and the commander as a cook. "It's been just as long since she last cooked."

"She made brownies before you came on board, Garrus," James said as he plopped himself down onto a chair near the turian.

Garrus turned to the lieutenant. "Brownies?"

"A human pastry, it's something between a cookie and a cake," James explained, making a square with his fingers to demonstrate.

Garrus did a creditable imitation of an aghast human, gaping with his mouth open. "A pastry made of _humans_?"

"No, _pendejo_ -" James stopped, realizing he'd just been scored on. "You know what I mean!"

Garrus fluttered his mandibles at the lieutenant and laughed. "You know, one of these days, I'm going to have to take that Reversal immunosuppressant, just to see what I've been missing."

"It's pretty expensive, and it's not exactly a foolproof way to eat levo food," Tali said.

"Sounds like someone's been doing some research," Kaidan said with a smile at the quarian.

Tali twisted her fingers together and shrugged. "Well, Garrus isn't the only one who's curious."

"Say, where's Liara? She said she was going out for drinks with you two last night," Kaidan said.

"I think she's nursing a hangover in her office," Garrus said, mandibles flared in a turian grin. "She may be the Shadow Broker, but she still can't hold her liquor worth a damn. Poor kid."

"Damn, Shepard's so intense, even when she's cooking," James remarked. "You'd think she was planning a counterattack or something. It's only food, right?"

Cortez joined them, dropping into a seat across from James with easy grace. "And that's why she's such an awesome cook, Mr. Vega - and you're not."

The younger marine shot the shuttle pilot an outraged glare. "Hey! I thought you liked my huevos rancheros."

Cortez raised his hands and laughed. "I did, I did."

Crossing his beefy arms over his chest, James retorted, "Well, you can cook your own damned huevos rancheros from now on!"

"Stop pouting, Mr. Vega, or I'll keep my new bottle of tequila to myself."

James's eyes narrowed. "You been holding out on me, Esteban?"

Kaidan's discreet cough, the unspoken warning that maybe they shouldn't be talking about getting drunk quite so loudly in a superior officer's hearing, succeeded in shutting the two lieutenants up. James's thwarted glare said without words that the discussion wasn't over, though; Cortez just looked amused.

Garrus, whose mandibles had been fluttering the whole time he'd been listening to the two men bicker, turned back to watch Shepard. "She's always like that, though. Like when she plays that game, what's it called again? Went?"

"I think you mean 'go'," Traynor corrected.

The turian gave the comm specialist a puzzled look. "Isn't that what I said?"

Traynor was spared from attempting to explain when Javik entered the mess; all conversation ceased as they stared in complete surprise at the Prothean. As far as Kaidan knew, Javik hadn't ventured out of his quarters on the engineering deck all this time - except to accompany Shepard on missions. The sudden silence caught the commander's attention, and she turned.

"Oh, hey, Javik," Shepard said. To Kaidan's surprise, she beckoned the Prothean over and pointed to a covered dish on the counter. "I made this for you."

Javik blinked all four of his eyes as he looked at down at the dish. "This is why you called me up here?" he asked, solving the mystery of just why he'd left the cargo bay.

The commander's eyes crinkled as the cinnamon stick made another round-trip across her mouth. "Uh-huh."

"What is it?" The Prothean's tone was full of wary suspicion.

"Your breakfast," Shepard replied, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "Give it a try." She cleared her throat, then said something that Kaidan's translator didn't pick up.

The Prothean had never bothered to hide his contempt of the primitives he'd found in his midst, but this simple gesture of generosity seemed to disarm him. Or maybe he was just shocked that the commander was doing such menial work - or it was what she'd said. Either way, Javik hesitated, then picked up the tray and took a seat at one of the mess tables, away from the rest of them.

"What was that all about?" James asked, the only one of them brave enough - or tactless enough - to say something.

Javik paused in the middle of lifting the lid before he spoke. "It is... a Prothean blessing that Shepard must have learned from the beacon. Roughly translated into your language, it means 'may this meal sustain you in the coming battles'. I... could not refuse."

Kaidan craned his neck just like everyone else to see what the contents were when Javik took off the cover. It looked like a breaded fish to him, since Shepard had removed neither the head nor the tail, but there were no slices of lemon included. His stomach rumbled; however it looked, it smelled delicious, and he watched in envy as the Prothean took a cautious bite.

"How is it?" Shepard called.

Javik took another bite. "It is... adequate." Kaidan rolled his eyes at the faint praise.

"Oh yeah? Let me try some -" James reached out to pinch a little for himself.

Javik snarled, lips peeling back to reveal his fangs as he pulled the plate back out of reach. "Get your own, human."

Cortez shook his head. "Why don't you just ask the commander to make you one, too, Mr. Vega?"

"You don't tell her what to make, Cortez," Kaidan demurred, "you take whatever she cooked, and you're damn grateful for it."

Traynor slanted a sly smile at Kaidan. "Not even you, Major?"

"Not even me." _When it comes to cookery, anyway._ An image of Shepard willingly allowing him to restrain her played out in all its erotic glory across his mind's eye, and he had to cross his legs, thanking God that he was at least sitting down. 

"All right, I'm done," Shepard declared, and raised her spoon in warning before the stampede - minus the dextros - started. "Three each, no more than that. Biotics are allowed to have five."

Kaidan wasn't the only one already stuffing his face before he'd even sat back down. The breakfast burrito was perfect, filled to bursting with scrambled eggs, potatoes and crunchy bits of bacon - or at least damned convincing substitutes - and spiced just right. He tried to smile at Shepard when she sat down next to him with her own tray, though he suspected his full mouth distorted the result a bit; her eyes danced with laughter at him as she sipped her tea.

"These are so good," Traynor said, eyes closed in gastronomic bliss as she took another bite of her burrito. "Thank you so much for making them, Commander."

Shepard smiled at the compliments tossed her way, taking them as her just due. "You're welcome."

"Damn good stuff, Commander - it's got some real bite to it," James said. "Esteban's right, damn him - this puts my huevos rancheros to shame."

Garrus coughed, looking up from his dextro ration, an oh-so-innocent lilt in his voice. "Speaking of which - it seems these 'burritos' bite back."

James looked up, eager as any bored soldier for gossip. "Huh?"

Kaidan struggled with the impulse to hunch over and turtle up to hide the hickeys from view. Damn Garrus and his eagle eyes - and his blabbing mouth, too! He glanced over to see Shepard's lips curve in that familiar enigmatic, I-know-a-good-joke smile, and decided he would take her example to heart.

It didn't take long for James - and everyone else - to spot the lovebites on Kaidan and Shepard. "Awww, shit," the lieutenant said in disgust, crumpling his napkin and throwing it down on his empty plate as he checked his omni-tool. "Guess you were right, Javik - you won... huh, half the jackpot."

All four of Javik's eyes narrowed at James. "What are you speaking of, human?"

James's mouth opened and shut in confusion as he shut down his omni-tool. "Whaddya mean? You're the one who asked to place a bet yesterday!"

"Bet?" There was a dangerous note of menace in Shepard's voice as she narrowed her eyes at the younger marine, mug of tea paused halfway to her lips.

"Uh," was James's intelligent answer as he backpedaled. "I was just - I mean, it's nothing, Commander - just having a little fun, yanno? Something to pass the time."

"And _what_ exactly were you betting on?" The commander's voice was frigid.

James shrank under Shepard's withering gaze, and said in a small voice, "Uh, just... when you and the major were going to, uh, get together."

The lieutenant didn't know Shepard well enough to spot the amusement hiding in her twitching lips - but Kaidan did, and decided to bail James out this one time. After all, he could afford to be magnanimous now that he'd won a substantial amount of credits.

"Actually, I was the one who placed the bet, James," Kaidan said, trying and failing to hide a triumphant smirk. "Javik let me use his account."

The younger man's eyes bulged in shock and outrage as he swiveled to face Kaidan, fear of the commander's wrath forgotten, while Cortez placed a hand over his mouth to try to hold in his laughter. 

Over the giggles escaping from Tali's helmet, despite the hands she'd placed over the vocalizer, James yelped, "You set me up, Major?!"

Shepard couldn't keep it together anymore at that point; she burst out laughing at the face James pulled. Once she could speak without sputtering, she said, " _Javik_ was the one who contacted you about placing a bet, and you weren't the least bit suspicious of a guy who told you games of chance were punishable by death in the empire?"

"Well... no - I mean, I was only looking at the number of credits he was - the major was putting into the pot," James said as he glared at Kaidan.

Kaidan just grinned back. "Come on, Lieutenant - you can't blame me for taking a little revenge now, can you?" _Considering I could have you up on charges of insubordination._

"The major's got a point, Mr. Vega," Cortez said, in between snickers.

James turned his glare on the shuttle pilot. "I thought you were supposed to be my friend, Esteban!"

"I am, I am," Cortez said, raising his hands again. "I just can't help it if seeing you hoist on your own petard is so damned hilarious."

"So who was the other winner of your little bet?" Kaidan asked, before the shuttle pilot could die laughing at James's expression.

"Sam," James said, finally leaving off glaring at his fellow lieutenant. "Not surprised she got it right - she's got all sorts of data at her fingertips, and she stands next to the commander all the time."

"Actually, James, um," the comm specialist began, her hands clapped over her mouth to hide her smile, though she couldn't hide her crinkling eyes.

To Kaidan's complete astonishment, Shepard spoke over the other woman and said, "I was the one who put Traynor up to it."

Kaidan stared at the commander. "You mean you _knew_?"

The commander's smile broadened into a huge grin. "I'm aware of everything that goes on around here - you should know that by now. Samantha let me use her account to place my bet."

James threw up his hands in disgust. "I can't believe this shit - _both_ of my superior officers set me up!"

Kaidan couldn't help it; the rumbling swell of mirth began in the pit of his stomach and rolled all the way up, and he doubled over, laughing. Shepard lost her gravity and shook with laughter, and when they recovered their composure, it only took one look at each other for them to lose it again.

"Screw you guys, I'm going back to the hangar." Gathering the tatters of his dignity about him, James snatched up his plate and threw it into the sink, then left.

Mandibles twitching like crazy, Garrus declared, "It was worth losing just to see his face."


End file.
